Reid: When Derek Morgan says "I do" it'll be a national day of mourning for single women everywhere.
Rossi: Just don't elope.
Lewis: Wow. Sounds like there's a story there.
Hotch: There is.
Rossi: I married the third ex-Mrs. Rossi at a drive-in wedding chapel in Las Vegas. I had an Elvis impersonator perform the ceremony.
Lewis: You're kidding.
Hotch: Wait for it.
Rossi: I'm playing 21. I've got a streak going. I can't lose even if I try. Krystall's the dealer. One thing leads to another. I should have known it wouldn't last. Krystall spells her name with a K and two Ls. When we sobered up the next morning, the divorce was just as quick. I'll never make that mistake again.
Morgan: What? Get married or have the King of Rock and Roll as your justice of the peace?
Rossi: Both, thank you very much.