Fat Barney and Ugly Robin

Fat Barney and Ugly Robin

The fat man and the old lady check themselves in the window one last time before they leave the diner... broken up.
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The Kraken Plan

The Kraken Plan

The Kraken launches her plan into effect and all it takes is Crazy Meg, Alan Thicke, and a storm trooper... okay just some dude in a robot costume.
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Overstuffed Stinson

Overstuffed Stinson

Good luck getting this guy to slim down, Robin. He has no reason not, now that he has the girl.
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Fat Barney

Fat Barney

Man, Barney has really let himself go. The guy needs a major diet, stat!
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How I Met Your Mother Season 5 Episode 7 Quotes

Barney [prerecored on porn tape]: Hello, Ted. If you're watching this tape, and I knew you'd pick this one, you're now in posession of my porn. And this can only mean one of two things: either I'm dead or I'm in a committed relationship. If I'm dead I want you to honor my memory by taking my body to the Hamptons and recreate Weekend at Bernies. I want to dance, go fishing, and I want to have sex with a girl. If on the other hand I'm in a committed relationship, as your best friend I have only one request... for the love of god get me out of it

Your girlfriend? She's your girl.. friend? She's a girl and a friend? Do not humanize the enemy, Ted.

Barney