Quotes
Frank [upside down in a trunk]: It's a goddamn booby trap!
Dee: It's not a booby trap, Frank. It's an empty trunk and you fell
into like a Weeble Wobble.
Yeah, I got into a squirmish with stray Chocolate Lab. I
Cricket
won't go into details, but sufficed to say that dog is very paralyzed
now.
Mac: Frank, where are you? You sound strained.
Frank: I'm stuck in a window over at Pop-Pop's house.
Charlie [Mac has joined Charlie eating disgusting old soup]: This is
why we work well together, ya know? You see free soup, you make a
decision to eat it.
Mac: It's horrible.
Charlie: It's terrible soup, but we have to stick to our decisions, right?
Mac: Yeah I can't go back on it now.
Dee: Are you saying that we have to decide whether or not that old
Nazi bitch lives or dies?
Lawyer: There's that charm.
Frank: Who invited the Jew Laywer?
Lawyer: Not Jewish!
Perfect for ocular patdowns.
Mac [Puts on weird sunglasses]
See, this is why communication is important in a relationship. Two minutes ago, I did not care if you lived or died, but right now..? I love you as no man as ever loved a woman.
Alan
You complete me; add another chick and I will complete myself.
Alan
Berta: You can just keep staring at your laptop all day.
Walden: I made a billion dollars doing this.
Berta: Well, carry on.
Howard: Attention people of Earth: Tonight, there will be two moons in the sky.
It had weaponized fruit and a puppet. What more do you want?
Leonard