Gilmore Girls Season 1 Episode 6: "Rory's Birthday Parties" Quotes
Emily: You know, you could get a maid in here once a week to at least tidy the place up.
Lorelai: I like it cluttered.
Emily: You can't even find the bed.
Lorelai: Yes I can. It's the thing I crash into on the way to the closet.
Emily: This Patricia --
Lorelai: Miss Patty.
Emily: She teaches dance?
Lorelai: Among other things.
Lorelai: You invited all these Chilton kids without even asking her.
Emily: They're her schoolmates. I assumed they were her friends.
Lorelai: Well, you know what they say when you assume things.
Emily: No, I don't, what do they say?
Lorelai: That -- you shouldn't.
Emily: Very clever.
Emily: Lorelai, I just tried some of those hors d'oeurves. They're unbelievable. Who is your caterer?
Lorelai: Sookie.
Emily: What's a Sookie?
Lorelai: (pointing to Sookie) That's a Sookie.
(Emily is silent in the car)
Richard: Emily?
Emily: She's right. I don't know my daughter at all.
Rory: So, is this party Grandma's having going to be a big deal?
Lorelai: Not really. The government will close that day. Flags will fly at half-mast. Barbara Streisand will give her final concert...again.
Rory: Uh-huh.
Lorelai: Now, the Pope has previous plans, but he's trying to get out of them. However, Elvis and Jim Morrison are coming and they're bringing chips.
Rory: You ask a simple question...
Lorelai: Oh, hey, Rory's birthday party is this Saturday night so start thinking up reasons why you can't come.
Michel: I'm going to be out of town.
Lorelai: Ooh, you used that one last year.
Michel: I'll work on it and get back to you.
Lorelai: 7:00, presents mandatory.
Rory: I'll be back in plenty of time to help you decorate.
Lorelai: No, this is your party. You do not work. You lounge and mock those who are. Have I taught you nothing?
Rory: Sorry, I'll try to be better.
Emily: And this man with the ice.
Lorelai: Luke.
Emily: How long have you been seeing him?
Lorelai: Luke? I'm not seeing Luke. He's just a friend.
Emily: Mm-hmm.
Lorelai: Mom, I swear. Luke keeps me in coffee, nothing else.
Emily: He seems to like you.
Lorelai: And you're judging this by what?
Emily: By the way he looked at you.
Lorelai: Which is how?
Emily: Like you were about to give him a lap dance.
Lorelai: Mom, he did not look at me like that.
Emily: You're pleased.
Lorelai: What?
Emily: You smiled. You're pleased that the ice man looked at you like a Porterhouse steak.
Lorelai: I'm smiling because you're crazy and that's what you do to crazy people to keep them calm.
