Nick: I don't mean to be abrasive. Especially since you're such a pleasure to imagine naked. Again, sorry.
Thirteen: It's okay.

Kutner: And no marriage either if our patient keeps saying everything that comes into his head without regard for the consequences.
Dr. Wilson: (to House) You always led me to believe you were one of a kind.

I'll pretend to be macho while a guy stuffs three feet of plastic up my nose. (to Taub) It's too bad it's not your nose. Lots more room to maneuver.


House: The MRI show anything?
Dr. Foreman: Nothing.
House: Good. What fun would that be?

Kutner: House decided to humor these parents.
Dr. Wilson: Maybe he had a great cup of coffee, or a tremendous bowel movement.

Here's my impression of Foreman on the happiest day of his life. (stares) Now the saddest day of his life. (stares)


Our new patient. Part girl. Part boy. All Thirteen's dream date.

Dr. Cuddy: The parents haven't told their son that he could have been their daughter. They want assurance that we won't either.
House: Less fun, but still.

(to Jackson's parents) You gave birth to a freak of nature. Doesn't mean it's a good idea to treat him like one..

Thirteen: We are adults. We can handle this. You just have to give us a chance.
House: No you are not. No you can't. And no, I don't.

I detect a stink of leftover faith.

Daniel: You want to talk hypocrisy, what about you? You act like you don't care about anyone, but here you are, saving lives.
House: Solving puzzles. Saving lives is just collateral damage.
Daniel: Yeah, nice try. I don't think you're looking for somebody to prove you right. I think you're looking for somebody to prove you wrong, to give you hope. You want to believe, don't you?

House Season 5 Quotes

House: If I wanted gifts, I would just look deep into my patients' eyes and act like you. "Oh, I'm so sorry you're dying, Mrs. Moron. Of course I'll sleep with you. What I lack in skill, I can make up for in..."
Dr. Wilson: You'd just wind up insulting her. Perhaps calling her "Mrs. Moron."

House: You talked to Wilson.
Taub: He has very girly handwriting, by the way.