Barney: Why are you trying to ruin my life?
Abby: You slept with me and you never called me again.
Barney: And?
Abby: That's it!
Barney: That's it?! As far as I'm concerned if I leave you safe on a dry land with adequate transportation home you got nothing to complain about!

• Permalink: Why are you trying to ruin my life? You slept with me and you ...
• Added: January 06, 2009

Ted: Hey, how was your day?
Lily: Today I yelled at a little girl for painting a rainbow.
Ted: A rainbow?! Sounds like that bitch had it coming

• Permalink: Hey, how was your day? Today I yelled at a little girl for pai...
• Added: January 06, 2009

Abby and I are in love. Not hot, passionate love. Couple love! You know, movie night with my girlfriend then waiting for her to go to bed so I can steal one pitiful moment of hollow ecstasy by the cold blue light of my computer monitor

Barney

• Permalink: Abby and I are in love. Not hot, passionate love. Couple love! Y...
• Added: January 06, 2009