Barney: Open your brain tank bro, cuz here comes some premium 91 octane knowledge. There's three rules of cheating: 1. It's not cheating if you're not the one who's married. 2. It's not cheating if her name has two adjacent vowels. 3. And its not cheating if she's from a different area code. You're fine on all three counts.
Ted: How do you know she's from a different area code?
Barney: She's 516. She might dress like she's 718 and act like she's 212, but trust me she's 516. Oh, and her husband letting her out alone on St. Patty's Day? If that dude's not 973 I'm 307...Wyoming.

• Permalink: 1. It's not cheating if you're not the one who's married. 2. It'...
• Added: January 06, 2009

Ted: Hi, I'm Ted.
Ashlee: Hi, I'm Ashlee -- with two E's.
Barney: Please, C's at most!

• Permalink: Hi, I'm Ted. Hi, I'm Ashlee -- with two E's. Please, C's at ...
• Added: January 06, 2009