Sam: You're supposed to say, you know, "Oh, Sam, sweetie, you can stay here as long as you want", and -and -and, then we eat cookies.
Andrea:Well, Sam, you're making me feel like a bad friend.
Sam: Well you're being a bad friend!

• Permalink: You're supposed to say, you know, Oh, Sam, sweetie, you can stay...
• Added: November 13, 2008

(on phone ordering food) Actually, uh, can you just bring me a bunch of stuff and stand next to me to see if I die?

Sam

• Permalink: (on phone ordering food) Actually, uh, can you just bring me a b...
• Added: November 13, 2008

I'm very hungry, but I keep starting fires.

Sam

• Permalink: I'm very hungry, but I keep starting fires.
• Added: November 13, 2008

Regina: Remember when you wanted a trampoline until you hit your head on a beehive?
Samantha: Why would you put a trampoline underneath a beehive?
Regina: To stop you from jumping too high!

• Permalink: Remember when you wanted a trampoline until you hit your head on...
• Added: November 13, 2008

Todd: What are you doing? Don't you know you're not supposed to put metal in the microwave?
Samantha: Well I do now! I think that something that important they'd got it written on there or something.

• Permalink: What are you doing? Don't you know you're not supposed to put me...
• Added: November 13, 2008