The Office Season 3 Episode 6: "Diwali" Quotes
Andy: We have such a roller coaster thing, Karen and I.
Jim: Excuse me?
Andy: Roller-coastery friendship. Hot and cold. On again, off again. Sexual tension-filled type of deal. It's very Sam and Diane.
Jim: Wow.
Andy: From Cheers.
Jim: Yup.
Andy: Yeah.
Tony: Karen, my chips got stuck in the vending machine again. I need your skinny little arms.
Karen: Oh, did you shake it?
Tony: Yeah, I shook it. I shook it!
Now, a lot of people say that Kelly is one in a million. And that's true, but it's also not true. Because, frankly, there are literally billions of people just like Kelly in the world.
Michael
I started biking to work. Josh does it, and he lives a lot farther away than I do. And also, it saves gas money, keeps me in shape, helps the environment, and now I know it makes me really sweaty for work.
Jim
Dwight: I see dead people.
Michael: Okay! Spoiler alert!
Dwight: He was dead the whole time.
Michael: Just stop it!
Dwight: Diwali is a celebration of the coronation of the God-king Rama, after his epic battle with Ravina, the demon-king of Lanka. It symbolizes the battle between good and evil.
Michael: All right, all right. This isn't Lord of the Rings.
Kelly: Um, Diwali is awesome. And there's food, and there's gonna be dancing. And, oh, I got the raddest outfit. It has, um, sparkles-
Michael: Kelly? Um, why don't you tell us a little bit about the origins of the holiday?
Kelly: Oh, um, I don't know. It's really old, I think.
Angela: How many gods do you have?
Kelly: Like hundreds, I think. Maybe more than that.
Angela: And that blue busty gal? What's her story?
Kevin: She looks like Pam from the neck down.
Dwight: Pam wishes.
I love the people here, and if there's one thing I don't really care for, its that they can be terribly terribly ignorant about other cultures. And I don't want them embarrassing me in front of my girlfriend, Carol.
Michael
Michael: It's important that this company celebrates its diversity. You know what, Stanley? Come Kwanzaa time, I have got you covered, baby!
Stanley: I don't celebrate Kwanzaa.
Michael: Wh- Really? You should! It's fun!
Indians do not eat monkey brains! And if they do... sign me up! Because I am sure that they are very tasty and nutritional.
Michael
Pam: I just feel kind of tired, you know?
Dwight: Maybe you've got mono.
Pam: Maybe.
Pam: I actually might not go. Feeling kind of tired.
Meredith: Do you wanna make appletinis and watch Sex and the City at my place?
Pam: Oh, I don't know. I haven't decided. Yet.