Venture Brothers
Sundays 11:30 PM on Cartoon NetworkVenture Brothers Season 1 Quotes
Dean: Question #1: You're in Prague, a snipers in the window above you, there's an alligator behind you, and a grizzly bear in front of you, what do you do? Do you...
Brock: Back somersault, pry off the alligator's jaw, use it as a boomerang to take out the sniper. He falls out the window, the grizzly will go straight for the easier meal
My good looks are going down the toilet faster than an unwanted pregnancy on prom night
Dr. Venture
Oh you're back! You didn't miss much. Oh one of [the strippers] was dressed like a cheerleader and said she was 19, but she had a Cesarean scar and her face had more lines on it than a mirror at Studio 54
Dr. Venture
Great - when Marrakesh is overwhelmed by mutant lizard people, don't come crying to me
Dr. Venture
Hank: Brock your training starts now! [gives Brock a glass of raw eggs] When I'm through with you you're gonna eat lightning and crap thunder!
Dean: Looks more like he's gonna eat eggs and crap....eggs
Hank, seriously - when I get my license back I'm allowed to kill you
Brock
Apparently this is the reward I get for years of screwing with super-science. In short, I pissed in God's eye... and he blinked
Dr. Venture
I will remember these last few days with you as the happiest of my life... well, except for the caterpillar part, I mean
Dr. Venture
O.S.I. Instructor: Well, let's see here, Mr. Samson. On the driving portion, you totalled every car but the one you were driving; on the pistol range, you refused to use a gun. And, uh, oh. Hah! Yeah, here's my favorite: on the written, you drew a little guy with wings from the Led Zeppelin records.
Brock: Icarus. So uh... what are you trying to tell me here, little man? That you don't like Zep?
Pete White: It's like wearing nothing at all. Like a second skin.
Dr. Venture: Ummm, you've got a little something brown on your nose
Hank: Hey Brock, how would you [kill me]?
Brock: You're asleep. Quick jerk of the neck. Never feel a thing.
Hank: You've thought about this.
Brock: Yes I have
Brock, I think I figured out why the plane crashed - there were skeletons driving it!
Dean