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Watching Kathy Geiss press herself against her big office window at 30 Rockefeller makes Jack think that either there's a change in the weather patterns or her father has woken up.

Well, he was right on both counts, as Don Geiss magically awakens from his coma by the grace of "a beam of energy" only to decide to stay on as CEO of GE. Jack is crushed.

Jack tells Liz he rented a jet to take her to her reunion as promised. It's on the way to Miami, where he plans to head for a little vacation, but due to inclement weather, they get trapped in Liz's small, newly dry hometown.

Desperate for alcohol after the recent turn of events and also at the fact that he's stuck in podunk USA, Jack follows Liz to her reunion, where he decides to masquerade as "Larry," a classmate everyone seems to love and miss.

Liz, on the other hand, was not loved or missed.

The coolest girl in school, Kelsey (Robyn Lively, older sister of Gossip Girl star Blake Lively), claims Liz made high school hell for her.

Liz was a bully who made fun of Kelsey's mom's drug addiction, some girl named Diane's fake leg, and more.

Some of Liz' other classmates boo her away in shame, but it appears that is really just the tip of the iceberg.

Back in New York, Kenneth is a regular laugh riot in the elevator, which upsets Tracy, who feels that is strictly his territory.

Tracy attempts to steal the thunder from Kenneth, but his "why are their no Puerto Ricans in Star Trek?" is an old Seinfeld bit and falls flat.

He does the only natural thing and brings Jenna in on it, who is shocked to find out Kenneth is trying to outshine them.

She rides the elevator with Kenneth for some proof, and when no one gives her a second glance but practically rolls on the floor over Kenneth, she performs an impromptu "Wind Beneath My Wings" verse.

"Larry" (a.k.a. Jack) is hitting if off with everyone especially guest star Janel Maloney, who was once romantically involved with Larry.

Something went awry, though, and she hopes he can forgive her.

He can and does, mostly because he has no idea what she's talking about, and decides these people, with their simple lives, are what happiness is about.

They decide to take it back old-school a notch by playing a combination of Spin the Bottle and Seven Minutes in Heaven.

Naturally, Jack and Liz end up in the closet together.

Inside he tells her that he won't be messing around with her because "it's social suicide." He also accuses her of being just as bad now as she was in high school.

She pulls out one of the business cards he had made for the CEO position and taunts him with "you went to a printer; you picked out a font" until he runs out of the closet, crying: "Why is she so mean?"

In order to teach Kenneth a lesson for being funny and stealing their jobs, Jenna delivers his lunch, and Tracy gives an NBC tour to a bunch of Japanese tourists.

Kenneth apologizes, and Tracy is quick to accept, but Jenna tells him to "keep crying" because she wants him to really feel this one.

Liz Lemon wins the Most School Spirit Award, but only because the gang wants to "Carrie her" - you know, like the movie, they are quick to explain to Jack.

She doesn't want to accept until she hears it means a $50 gift certificate to a steak house, but just as the bucket is about to tip over, Jack comes to her rescue again with a speech about how "we all make mistakes."

In order to cope, he uses "sex and awesomeness," while Liz hides behind insults even though, deep deep down, she's a good person.

Janel Maloney tells him how happy they all are to have him back in their lives - and brings out their teenage love child, which is, of course, when he finally drops the charade and rushes off stage.

30 Rock
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30 Rock Season 3 Episode 5 Quotes

Jack: Hey Lemon, check this out, I just made it up: the three B's: beers, boats, and buds. Doesn't that sound great?
Liz: Are you having a stroke?

Show her the ugly duckling has turned into a vaguely ethnic swan.