Gossip Girl Round Table: "Salon of the Dead"

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Welcome to our weekly Gossip Girl Round Table discussion! Below, our panelists are here to break down Monday's episode (see our official Gossip Girl review from last night) in even greater detail.

In a Q&A session below, TVF CEO Eric Hochberger (Gossip Guy) editor Steve Marsi (Mister Meester) and staff writers Courtney Morrison, Christina Tran and Leigh Raines to discuss "Salon of the Dead."

Weigh in with your take on the following topics after reading ours!

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1. What was your favorite quote or scene from the episode?

Courtney: Chuck's reaction to finding out Diana is his mother. Ed Westwick rocked this episode. 

Leigh: Nothing can really beat the fact that Chuck was yelling at Diana that she was "banging" his best friend in the next room.

Christina: Diana: “I intended on watching you from afar.” Chuck: “Nate’s bed is not that far.” Chuck can still be witty while being down in the dumps.

Steve: Dorota still calling Dan Lonely Boy when he is not only dating Blair, but in the process of planning an elaborate public outing with Blair.

Eric: When Blair made reference to Vanessa What's Her Last Name? I kind of miss my frenemy... and raccoon eyes at this point.

Gossip Girl Round Table Logo 2012

2. Diana's big reveal: OMFG or eh?

Courtney: Eh. I was hoping that she wouldn't turn out to be Chuck's mom because it was too predictable. At least we now know that Bart had a baby mama, making that a little more interesting. Hopefully the real secret that G.G. is holding on to is better than that.

Leigh: The only a surprise was how easily Diana just revealed it to Serena in the next room.

Christina: Major eh. I loved Chuck’s retort, though, immediately following the “big” reveal.

Steve: It was pretty obvious after the past few weeks that she gave him the transfusion, but I still thought she'd be a sister or an aunt, not his mother. So ... slight OMG, but with a side of eh. Next?

Eric: Given that our Round Table has been speculating about it since October, I can't help but feel underwhelmed by this big reveal. I really hope whatever the real secret Gossip Girl is more OMFG worthy. 

3. More inept performance: Lola at scheming or Serena as Gossip Girl?

Courtney: Both were pretty bad, but I will choose Lola as the worst. I did love that Serena had a video upload app that went straight to the Gossip Girl site. What did we do before iPhones? 

Leigh: Lola was like a baby deer trying to figure out how to work her legs.

Christina: I simply can’t choose between the two because they were both epic fails. Lola should reconsider her dream of becoming an actress while S should just ... I don’t really know what else she could be doing, but it definitely won’t be adding ‘blogger’ to her resume.

Steve: Lola the adorable baby doe, as Leigh put it, is at least naive when it comes to this stuff. Serena has been the subject of UES gossip for years, yet isn't the least bit subtle about her powers as GG? "Guess she's not so irrelevant after all!" Really? Could you try to blow your own cover any more? Weak. At least Georgina is well versed in black ops.

Eric: Lola. First, she was terrible at it. For a wanna-be actress, did she really need to lay things on so thick when telling S Gossip Girl would need to blog about the book to keep relevant? Secondly, she doesn't even have the backbone for it. She finally gets what she needs to oust S and nothing? The woman who just destroyed you? You are so not UES.

Blake Lively as Serena

4. Which couple will last longer, Dan and Blair or Rufus and Lily?

Courtney: Rufus and Lily. If she was able to live with him on a Lincoln Hawk tour bus, she will be able to keep her marriage together. 

Leigh: Rufly always come back to each other. Could give less than a crap about Dair. I respect that you need to experience dating different people as you grow up, but Blair and Dan turned into completely different people.

Christina: Rufly. Like their party, Dair was terribly boring.

Steve: Dan and Blair. They at least talk to each other about their problems and aren't so obsessed with the different "worlds" they come from that they lose sight of what relationships are supposed to be about.

Eric: I never thought I'd say this, but my money is on Dair. They sadly seem like the more honest, mature couple. No, they may not throw the best salon (not that I have any to compare it to), but they definitely fit in each others' worlds...

5. Rate last night's party-crashing on a scale of 1-10.

Courtney: Totally with Eric. The salon was a dud so I'm going with a 4.

Leigh: That party sucked. Where was Dorota? Both hosts would never leave to get ice. Also your party is obviously boring if everyone can hear their cell go off at the same time.

Christina: -7. Lamest Gossip Girl party ever.

Steve: The question pertains to the party crashing, people, not the actual salon ... whatever that was. Chuck slumming it in the 718 alone warrants a few points, and the fact that none of those peeps were invited and just kept rolling up to Blair's meticulously-crafted event? There was some humor in that. 6.

Eric: Who cares? Who wants to crash a salon that didn't have enough ice for a proper Pimm's Cup?

6. What was the least-believable eavesdropping moment of the night?

Courtney: The Diana reveal. No one who has hid a secret for that many years is going to talk about it with a twenty-something she barely knows at a party. 

Leigh: Diana casually chatting about her secret to Jack in an open hallway.

Christina: Lola creeping on Serena and Diana. Seriously, I thought Lola was just going to prove her point about S as GG by showing Nate the GG app or even digging through her e-mail. By the way, when will the UES learn how to password protect their phones?

Steve: Courtney hit the nail on the head. Not only did she reveal the secret to Serena, a near total stranger, in public, but with unmistakable clarity, almost trying to emphasize I'm his mother! Unintentional comedy.

Eric: It's sad when there's enough eavesdropping plot advancements to even have this question. As ridiculous as Diana having sensitive conversations inside hallways was, I still have to give it to Lola eavesdropping on D's big reveal. Not because I was shocked of their timing or location, but that Gossip Girl has a dedicated app she built just for uploading video! This from the same girl who can't figure out how to recover a password...

Big Payne

7. What is Diana's other secret?

Courtney: I'm guessing that Jack is Chuck's real father. If so, that is one seriously hot family.

Leigh: I think it's something to do with where she gets her money.

Christina: Jack is really Chuck’s dad. It might seem too soapy, but this is Gossip Girl.

Steve: Looking like that at age 46.

Eric: That she's actually a secret agent and Chuck's real father is none other than Austin Powers. No, seriously, what do you guys think? Bart not being Chuck's dad? Maybe losing his inheritance to next-of-kin, Jack Bass?

What do you think? Sound off in the comments!

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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"Looking like that at age 46." Best round table answer ever!

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