The Good Fight
Thursdays on Paramount+The Good Fight Season 5 Episode 4: "And the clerk had a firm..." Quotes
Charles: Can I come in?
Carmen: I would rather it was during work hours.
Charles: You know I would too, but we just have 12 minutes to discuss an important issue.
Carmen: What does Mr. Rivi need?
Charles: Well, that’s what our conversation is gonna be about. See, Oscar likes to help his friends, and he considers you a friend.
Carmen: Oh, I don’t need any friends, Mr. Lester.
Charles: Well, you do on this one. First, you can’t tell anyone I was here or how you heard this. You have to promise me.
Carmen: Promise.
Charles: You said that too fast. Think about it, then promise.
Carmen: Promise.
Charles: Good, so Oscar has friends in the police department, and in about 10 minutes a search warrant is about to be served on someone close to you.
Carmen: Who?
Charles: Someone at your firm.
Carmen: Yeah, who?
Charles: The police are not actually serving the warrant. The FBI is, and that’s how Oscar got the information because the police hate the Feds.
Carmen: And who is being served?
Charles: Let me see. I have this on one of those notes.
David Lee: Very funny, though maybe problematic.
Del: Morgan’s act is edgy, and that’s what we want, but now someone has posted this video online, and we’re getting a lot of Twitter pushback.
Liz: Ah, so you’re worried about being canceled?
Del: Ooh, don’t say the c-word, but yeah.
David Lee: Well, we want your business, Mr. Cooper. You want us to sue? We’re ready.
Del: No, I want you to do a sensitivity read.
Liz: Really?
Del: Yes, we have an $8 million contract to stream her act, so we want you to review her set for cultural inaccuracies, representation issues, bias, stereotypes, problematic language, blah blah blah.
Liz: And why?
David Lee: Because clearly we’re one of the best firms in Chicago.
Del: Because you’re a Black firm, and most of Morgan’s jokes touch on racial themes. And we were thinking of bringing you all of our legal business anyway, so this might be a good way to take you for a test drive.
Nancy: Diane, such a pleasure to face you in court. Do you have a minute?
Diane: Ms. Crozier…
Nancy: Nancy’s fine.
Diane: If this is the moment you impress me with all the evidence you have against my husband and suggest he cope a plea, we can do that right here.
Nancy: Certainly. Dylan Pike says Kurt is not only concealing the names of insurrectionists, but that he was the ringleader of those insurrectionists.
Diane: Really? The accused man you threatened with prison threw someone else under the bus. How novel.
Nancy: Diane, if I were your husband, I’d talk. Mr. Pike seemed very convincing, and we know how these things work. The first person who talks gets a deal. The last person who talks gets prison, 20 years to be specific.
Diane: I think it’s time to talk.
Kurt: It wasn’t a legal issue. It was something for work.
Diane: If you’re keeping it from the FBI, it’s a legal issue. Are you not telling me because I’m your lawyer or because I’m your wife?
Kurt: Because your politics.
Diane: Oh come on, turning in insurrectionists should be our politics.
Kurt: Diane, this works between us because we don’t let our political judgments overwhelm our respect for each other.
Diane: Kurt, I lived through eight years of the Tea Party and four years of Trump, but Jan. 6 changed everything for me. I can’t treat this like a chess game anymore.
Kurt: What is the chess game here? Us? This marriage?
Diane: No, that’s the one thing that’s not a game.
Marissa: Well, what’s the case?
Wackner: NFT fraud.
Marissa: I don’t know what that is.
Wackner: Non-fungible token. Someone sold a painting that was an NFT fake, and they’re suing them for $4 million.
Marissa: You’re hearing a case involving $4 million?
Wackner: It’s a jury trial.
Marissa: OK, but that’s… this was cute when it was the people’s court, but why would anyone agree to let you decide?
Wackner: Signed and notarized. Both sides will honor the jury’s verdict.
Marissa: But this was notarized in your fictional court by you about a fictional case.
Wackner: About a fictional crime -- faking an NFT. Marissa, it seems there are some last-remaining braincells in there that are unwilling to climb onboard. This is a court. In fact, it’s better than a court. A court is defined by the justice it administers, not by the ceremony it displays. So come on. I bought your services from your law firm. I have a chair for you out there. It has your name on it. What else do you need?
Diane: I need to know who told you about the search warrant.
Carmen: I was asked not to divulge.
Diane: You cannot be asked that. I’m covered by the same attorney-client privilege that covers you.
Carmen: It’s my understanding that the search warrant was served on another case, not one of mine, one regarding your husband’s.
Diane: So this came from Rivi?
Carmen: I apologize. I can’t confirm that.
Diane: Carmen, you have been here three weeks. You have two clients: Wolf-Coleman and Oscar Rivi. It’s one or the other.
Carmen: Can I make a phone call, Ms. Lockhart?
Diane: I think that would be smart.
Julius: Did you get a card on your desk?
Liz: Yeah, mine says good for one joke about little people. What about you?
Julius: White girl clothes.
Liz: Huh, did you use it?
Julius: What does that mean, use it?
Liz: Well, I think it means you’re supposed to use this card to tell one joke.
Julius: Oh I don’t want to tell a joke about white girl clothes.
Liz: All right, then trade me.
Julius: Is this about people making fun of the partners because they think we’re not funny?
Liz: Well, I don’t know. Maybe we need to look for someone with a partners card.
Marissa: Why are you interested?
Cord: This is the future. We’re disrupting things, you see -- commerce, travel, communications, currency, now justice. The key isn't the money. The key is I’m bringing cases.
Marissa: To the backroom of a copy store?
Cord: Have you ever seen the garage where they founded Hewlett-Packard? It’s about a fifth the size of this room, and it’s a museum now. It’s our hallowed ground. Twenty years from now this will be a museum. It will be a shrine to justice.
Diane: I should have told you. I’m sorry. But I knew you’d be upset, so I withheld. I was wrong. So what happened? Did you take the fifth? Did she allow it? Kurt?
Kurt: I need a new lawyer.
Jay: Is there anything we can’t do?
Mailroom worker: Necrophilia?
Marissa: No that could be funny.
Jay: Autism.
Mailroom worker: Selena Gomez’s kidney transplant.
Marissa: What’s so funny?
Jay: Just how the partners’ ideas on comedy lack…
Marissa: Actual humor.
Mailroom worker: Yeah, and grit and grime. I like my comedy like I like my women.
Marissa: Dirty?
Mailroom worker: No, sharp and mean. When we were kids, we used to cut each other up.
Jay: At my school, we used to crack on each other about everything. If you had a limp, speech impediment, if your hair was too nappy, too straight. If you were fat or looked starved.
Marissa: Are you serious? We peed in a girl’s shampoo bottle.
Mailroom worker: That crosses a line.
Jay: Now it’s like you need a permission slip to tell a joke.
Mailroom worker: That’s why I printed up these. Boom.
Marissa: Oh my god, a permit to tell a joke. I love it.
