Therapist: I do think the medications and our sessions are having an effect, Toby.
Toby: I concur doc, I feel good. Now if only we could find somebody who wanted to date a guy who looked like swallowed the Unabomber.

• Permalink: I concur doc, I feel good. Now if only we could find somebody who wanted to date a guy who...
• Added: October 23, 2018

Teen Randall: Hey, can you take it with you into the shower Kev? We're going to be late for the Prom.
Teen Kevin: Prom's not for three hours, Randall.
Teen Kate: Which is about how long it takes you to do your hair.
Teen Kevin: And I exit.

• Permalink: And I exit.
• Added: October 23, 2018

Kevin: How do I introduce you anyway? My documentarian girlfriend, does that work?
Zoe: You introduce me as Zoe, human being whose a documentarian, who you happen to be dating.
Kevin: Kind of a mouthful, but we'll go with it.

• Permalink: Kind of a mouthful, but we'll go with it.
• Added: October 23, 2018

Beth: You cannot cry on the campaign trail.
Randall: I'm not going to cry.
Beth: You're an emotional man, Randall. You talk about fathers, you cry. You talk about daughters, you cry. You talk about the little brown boy on the corner who tried to sell lemonade in the winter, you cry.
Randall: The lemonade froze, Beth.
Beth: Yeah well he was stupid, baby.

• Permalink: Yeah well he was stupid, baby.
• Added: October 23, 2018