Will & Grace
Thursdays 9:00 PM on NBCWill & Grace Quotes
Jack: Give me half that money or else.
Theodore: Or else? Hitting a black man is a hate crime too. Rarely enforced, but still.
Jack: Well I'm not racist.
Theodore: And I'm not homophobic.
Jack: Then it looks like we've arrived at a real Mexican standoff. Wait, is that bad? Should it be hispanic stand off? Or is saying stand off like I think they're all stand offish?
Theodore: I think you need to be more earth tone neutral. I think it's Latino American now.
Jack: Oh right, totally. Then it looks like we've arrived at a real Latino American misunderstanding.
Theodore: Get out of my way or I'll…
Jack: Or you'll what? You can't hit a gay man; it's a hate crime.
Why Beverly Leslie, I thought they'd torn down all the corroded, old, confederate statues.
Karen
Grace: I can still pull this dress off, right?
Will: You should pull that dress off, and put on a different dress.
Will: Hey, this suit says senior partner, right, not lesbian minister?
Grace: Change the tie.
Skip: It's hard being me sometimes.
Jack: I know, but I'm going to be there for you as much as I can, and when I'm not I want you to picture me in your head, looking at you like I am right now, and saying you are exactly who you're supposed to be.
When you get older you'll understand that there was the family you were born into and the family that you choose. The family I chose, well it doesn't get any better than that.
Jack
The point is, this place can't fix you because you're not broken.
Jack
So what are we supposed to do? As a sperm donor the law doesn't recognize you as a relative, just someone who made a little money doing what he would normally do for free.
Will: Wow, look at you. You're a real Texan now.
Elliott: I am. I drank the Kool Aid and can no longer separate church and state.
Karen: Close your mouth kid, you're going to catch a fly.
Skip: Jesse Tyler Ferguson, she is fabulous.
Will: Don't get too excited, we can't know for sure.
Jack: Really, the Pajama Party position? Is that not enough evidence to convict Miss Demeanor over there?
Will: Take it easy. We are not doing an episode of Law & Order: LBGTQ.
