Archer

Mondays 10:00 PM on FX
Archer
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Archer is back with new episodes on January 13. Check out this space pirate-themed teaser now.

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Archer Season 5 Episode 1 Quotes

Lana: Screw you, Mr My-mother's-a-lying-bitch-and-I'm-too-stupid-to-realize-my-life's-a-pathetic-joke!
Archer: Nice to meet you, Mrs Hello-my-kid's-from-a-sperm-bank-since-I-can't-keep-a-man-because-in-addition-to-my-jillion-neuroses-I-have-a-weird-looking-vagina!

Cheryl: You're all jealous of my fall-back career!"
Pam: As what, an ACTUAL acorn?

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