TV Quotes of the Week: The United States of Tara, House and More!

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From a mother with multiple personalities to a perpetually grump doctor to a man named Gary who is unmarried, our TV quotes section is chock full of the funniest utterances of the season.

Click on the preceding link to vote on your favorites.

Meanwhile, enjoy the following samples of quotes from this week's slew of new episodes across the television dial...

Sarah: I don't know how to Twitter and I don't have a Facebook page. | permalink -- Brothers & Sisters
Hurley: Look, everything's going to make sense. I promise.
Hurley's mom: It better! | permalink -- Lost
Gary: Are you okay?
Tom: No I'm not okay, my heart is beating so fast my tie is moving. | permalink -- Garry Unmarried
Megan: Sage, when I was your age, my biggest concern was trying to get Ethan Hawke to marry me. The Realty Bites Ethan Hawke, not the "I left my wife for my nanny and haven't showered in ten days" Ethan Hawke. | permalink -- Privileged
Dr. Cuddy: When's the last time you showered?
House: Scent of a man. I realize you haven't experienced it sober. | permalink -- House
T: Dude, I have been digging around in your closet for an hour and I can't freaking get to Narnia. | permalink -- The United States of Tara
Tara Photo

Matt Richenthal is the Editor in Chief of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Twitter and on Google+.


TV Quotes Quotes

Amanda: You don't know how you made it to the surface?
Nolan: No, but the purple skins do.
Amanda: Purple skins?
Nolan: I'll tell you on the way

Conquer! Kill! Devour! Put it on a T-shirt so you don't forget.

Doc Yewll