Two and a Half Men Review: "Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair"

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We learned two things from this week's episode of Two and a Half Men: The writers really do seem to be stickign with this horrible Chelsea-Charlie storyline and giving us lame Charlie plotlines, but at least Alan's B Story can hold up the episode.

Luckily, Alan and his "Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair" product and horrible online dating (despite not actually seeing the dates) kept us entertained.  We used to count on Charlie for the adventures in this show.  Now he seems content to sleep with Chelsea, whine, and show his sensitive side.  Oh yeah, that's what we signed up for.

Charlie Fails to Please Chelsea

Did we at least mention how phenomenal Berta was?  She's always been one of our favorite supporting cast members, but in this episode she really shined.  She was around the entire episode giving advice and scarring our minds with images of her sleeping with the water guy.

Now for some of the surprisingly good Two and a Half Men quotes from this mediocre episode:

Chelsea: You do realize Jake just snuck out of the house...
Charlie: He's grounded, how else is he supposed to leave? | permalink
Charlie: So that's it, that's all i have to look forward to? A wife that has to go to a happy place every time I have sex with her.
Berta: Is Chelsea complaining?
Charlie: No.
Berta: Can you read her mind?
Charlie: No.
Berta: Then don't worry about it. | permalink
Charlie: I don't know how to tell you this, but your bangs are dripping down your face.
Alan: Little lesson for you. There's two things you never wanted to buy on the cheap: canned hair and condoms.
Charlie: I'm assuming it never got to condoms.
Alan: No, it did not. Once my hair started dripping on her chicken marsala the evening was pretty well shot. | permalink
Charlie: This is the beginning of the end. First our sex life goes to hell. Then we start eating dinner at 4:30, watching reruns of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, then at nine o'clock, we pee, shake hands and go to sleep. | permalink

Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.

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Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 9 Quotes

You usually grab my ass like you're holding a tree trunk in a hurricane. This time it was more like you were palming a couple cantaloupe at the supermarket.


Berta: I thought you were taking your girlfriend out for dinner.
Jake: I am, but I thought if I eat first I won't pig out in the restaurant and make her sick.
Berta: Good idea, then you'll have the whole rest of the night to make her sick.
Jake: Exactly. Plus, I won't snap at her if she reaches for one of my fries.