American Idol Review: Family Vacation

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Following a DVR debacle on Sunday evening (thanks a lot Giants/49ers and stupid playoff overtime!), I was more excited than ever to get my American Idol back on last night. Let's take off for the mountains of Aspen, shall we?

All American Idol
Haley Smith on American Idol

Overly-energetic Jenni Shick is most certainly energetic enough for kindergarteners but way too energetic for me. J.Lo liked her energy, though, so she got a Golden Ticket. And a kiss from Steven.

The Contestant Cam is apparently big on showing us people who are barely awake and still caked in drool. I'm not a fan of seeing people barely awake and caked in drool. Curtis Gray was tonight's Contestant Cam... um... contestant. I think the judges heard something I didn't. To me his performance was mediocre at best, but they liked him and sent him through.

Richie Law reminds me too much of Scotty McCreery, Devan Jones had a really smooth audition--and scalp--and Mathenee Trego BUTCHERED THE BEATLES. Butchered. He changed the arrangement so much for his audition the song was nearly unrecognizable. All three got Golden Tickets.

"I could be amazing, too!" cried Tealana Hedgespeth. She says she's been living in her twin sister's shadow their whole lives. She should probably find a different way to get out of that shadow because singing isn't how she's going to do it.

Haley Smith described herself as a "vegetarian working in the meat department," which is maybe the biggest oxymoron of the night. Hollywood will devour her like a lion on an antelope, I'm sure of it. I suppose we'll see when she gets there.

Something I never thought I'd hear on Idol? The phrase "Rocky Mountain Oysters." Alanna Snare is a bartender/waitress who works in an establishment famous for that particular dish. That'll probably be her only claim to fame.

Shelby Tweten is one to watch. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 16, she credits American Idol with helping keep her healthy. I think tonight's episode was made better by having her on it and I can't wait until we see more of her in Hollywood.

Any time contestants say they're going to sing an original song, my jaw clinches up a little bit. Jairon Jackson, however, did a great job of impressing the judges with both his voice and his lover's personality. And then he did a scissor kick while exiting the building and broke a light bulb with his head. Let's hope the ceilings are a little higher in Hollywood.

Angie Zeiderman, a self-proclaimed "Vintage Glitter Queen," compared herself to Lady Gaga. Then she sang "When You Got It, Flaunt It" from The Producers, complete with a Swedish accent. J.Lo fought for her despite Zeiderman's awkward writhing on the floor and asked her to sing again, so, of course, she did. Her rendition of "Blue Bayou" showed that she's slightly more than just a show-tune crooner and helped sway Randy's vote to "yes." She went to Hollywood.

Closing the night was "Magic Cyclops," a ridiculous stunt of an audition that was a serious waste of my time. And the judges time. And America's time. And even the contestant's time! He appeared under a pseudonym with dark glasses and awkward hair and a fake British accent. Unless his normal gig is being bizarre, I can't imagine what he got out of that audition

The talent pool in Aspen wasn't the best we've seen this year and the producers relied on the usual shtick of showing the awkward and odd auditions to fill the hour. I've been pleasantly surprised with the lack of "bad" auditions so far this year, but tonight left me a little underwhelmed. The judges found 31 more contestants to send to Hollywood, however, so I suppose it wasn't a total bust?

What'd you think? Who was your favorite? Were you as irritated by Magic Cyclops as I was?


Editor Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
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Miranda Wicker is a Staff Writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.