Anthony John "A.J." Soprano, Jr. is the underachieving son of crime boss Tony Soprano on the HBO classic, The Sopranos. Just some of the wonderful things AJ has done includes he crashed his mother's car, smoked marijuana at his own confirmation, got drunk on stolen communion wine, vandalized his school swimming pool, and was finally expelled after cheating on a test.

A.J. Soprano Quotes

Livia Soprano: (to A.J.) Come over here, say a hail mary for your grandfather.
Uncle Junior: Lay off, he's a kid.
Livia Soprano: So he should neglect his elders, just like his father?
Uncle Junior: Yeah, real scamp.
Livia Soprano: My son, the mental patient.

So what, no fucking ziti now?

A.J.
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The Sopranos Quotes

(to Mahaffey) That's a shame. A medication comes along after your gambling gets your fucking hip busted to shit.

Big Pussy

Dr. Melfi: Have you ever had a prostate exam?
Tony: Are you kidding? I don't let anyone wag their finger in my face.