Cosmo Kramer is Jerry's crazy neighbor across the way in his apartment complex.  Krmaer is a ridiculous human being who is constantly known for barging into Jerry's apartment and eating all his food.  Though Kramer never has a steady job, he is constantly scheming throughout the series whether it's making a coffee book about coffee tables or co-creating the Bro with Frank Costanza.

Cosmo Kramer Quotes

Jerry: "Quone"?
Helen: 3031
Jerry: "Quone"? No, I'm afraid that I'm going to have to challenge that.
(Jerry picks up the dictionary.)
Helen: 32
Kramer: No, you don't have to challenge that. That's a word. That's a definite word.
Jerry: I am challenging.
Kramer: Quone. To quone something.
Jerry: Uh-huh.
(Jerry looks up the word.)
Helen: I'm not playing with you anymore.
Morty: Quone's not a word.
Jerry: No good. Sorry. There it is. Get it off.
Helen: (to Kramer) Why did you make me put that down?
Kramer: Nah, we need a medical dictionary! If a patient gets difficult, you quone him.

Kramer (Kessler): You got any meat?
Jerry: Meat? I don't, I don't know, go hunt!

Seinfeld Quotes

George: Why don't they have salsa on the table?
Jerry: What do you need salsa for?
George: Salsa is now the number one condiment in America.
Jerry: You know why? Because people like to say "salsa." "Excuse me, do you have any salsa?" We need more salsa." "Where's the salsa? No salsa?"
George: You know, it must be impossible for a Spanish person to order seltzer and not get salsa. "I wanted seltzer, not salsa!"
Jerry: "Don't you know the difference between seltzer and salsa?! You have the seltzer after the salsa!"

George: I like sports. I could do something in sports.
Jerry: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. In what capacity?
George: You know, like the general manager of a baseball team or something.
Jerry: Yeah. Well, that - that could be tough to get.
George: Well, it doesn't even have to be the general manager. Maybe I could be like, an announcer. Like a colour man. You know how I always make those interesting comments during the game.
Jerry: Yeah. Yeah. You make good comments.
George: What about that?
Jerry: Well, they tend to give those jobs to ex-ballplayers and people that are, you know, in broadcasting.
George: Well, that's really not fair.
Jerry: I know. Well, okay. Okay. What else do you like?
George: Movies. I like to watch movies.
Jerry: Yeah. Yeah.
George: Do they pay people to watch movies?
Jerry: Projectionists.
George: That's true.
Jerry: But you gotta know how to work the projector.
George: Right.
Jerry: And it's probably a union thing.
George: (scoffs) Those unions. (sighs) Okay. Sports, movies what about a talk show host?
Jerry: Talk show host. That's good.
George: I think I'd be good at that. I talk to people all the time. Someone even told me once they thought I'd be a good talk show host.
Jerry: Really?
George: Yeah. A couple of people. I don't get that, though. Where do you start?
Jerry: Well, that's where it gets tricky.
George: You can't just walk into a building and say "I wanna be a talk show host".
Jerry: I wouldn't think so.
George: It's all politics.
Jerry: All right, okay. Sports, movies, talk show host. What else?
George: This could have been a huge mistake.
Jerry: Well, it doesn't sound like you completely thought this through.