Stan: I have it! I have the question. Now you have to answer me once and for all! How come I haven't gotten my period yet?! (everyone is speechless) God: My child, you are a boy. Boys do not get periods. That is only for girls. You're friends were bleeding a little bit out of their asses due to an acute colon infection, and you're friend Kyle simply lied about it. Kyle: Hey, how'd he know that?! God: You will hit puberty when the time is right, but you will never have a period because you are a man with titties.
Rod Stewart: Poop pants. Jesus: What? Rod Stewart: Poop pants. Jesus: You pooped your pants? Nurse, Mr. Stewart has apparently pooped his pants. Nurse: Again? Now, Mr. Stewart, what did we say about trying to hold in Mr. Dookie?