Barney Stinson Quotes
Lily: You'll be playing with two charter members of the East Meadow Alley Cats.
Marshall: We're a hot dog eating team with a bowling problem.
When did I become such a gooey romantic?
Ted: Barney that was my VCR.
Barney: Ted, it was a VCR!
Ted: Barney, you've really grown up, you know that?
Barney: Thanks, now lets watch our two best friends have sex on tape!
To the outdated viewing device!
Do you think that if we did it...and I did a really good job...that I could turn that into my baby?
Oh God I am so hungover! Oh God, Lily's not wearing a bra!
Get, drunk, of course! Good circling Ted.
Ted, tonight is gonna be Epic- wait for it...Dary! Wait that's not it, how do I usually say it? Ugh I hate this Quinn girl!
Where has this heavenly vehicle been all my life? Can you hear it's inspiring chant Ted? I think I can get laid, I think I can get laid, it's the little engine with wood!
Barney: Come on Robin, it's my penis we're talkin' about! You've seen her, she's magnificent!
Barney: Every penis is a girl Robin. Everyone knows that, like ships...and lake monsters.
For God's sake Lily, you're pregnant! For God's sake Ted, Lily's pregnant!