Rex: So you didn't tell them about...
Bree: Your adultery? No. I decided to keep that little gem all to myself

You want to see how long I can hold a grudge? Go ahead and abandon my father, because I promise you, you'll be sorry

Andrew

Mike: You know, I retract my earlier statement. I no longer love you. In fact, I just think of you as a really good buddy.
Susan: No. No, no, no. You obviously think you have some insight into my soul, so please, go ahead, dazzle me.
Mike: Your divorce left you hurt and vulnerable.
Susan: Big insight. The postman knows that.

Edie Britt could never understand why she didn't have any female friends. Of course, she always tried to tell people she didn't need any, but the truth was, it bothered Edie that other women didn't seem to like her. Even after moving to Wisteria Lane, Edie couldn't understand why her neighbors kept their distance. And then she met Martha Huber. Within five minutes, Mrs. Huber managed to disparage what Edie was wearing. In fact, whenever they got together, Mrs. Huber insulted her. She made fun of everything from Edie's makeup to her taste in men. Yes, Martha Huber could be cruel, offensive, and downright mean. But Edie didn't care, because she was the first real friend Edie Britt had ever had. But now Martha Huber was missing. She had vanished without a trace, and Edie was not embarrassed to admit, she needed her back

Mary Alice

Maisy: Oh, Bree. What a nice surprise. Would you like to come in?
Bree: Well, that depends. Are you having an affair with my husband?

Bree: As of this moment, Rex, I am no longer your wife. I am going to go out, and find the most vindictive lawyer I can find, and together, we are going to eviscerate you. I'm going to take away your money, your family, and your dignity. Do you hear me?
Rex: Bree...
Bree: And I am so thrilled to know that you still love me. Because I want what's about to happen to you...to hurt as much as humanly possible. I'm so glad you didn't die before I got a chance to tell you that

Maisy: You're not going to tell a soul. Bree, you may hate me, but you'd hate the humiliation a lot more.
Bree: Oh, I don't hate you, Maisy. I pity you

To understand Maisy Gibbons, you first need to know how she spent her afternoons. Her mornings were spent running errands for her husband. Her evenings were spent washing dishes and helping with homework. But her afternoons, well, they were spent in the company of men. Frustrated. Misunderstood. Lonely men. Willing to pay money to feel a little less lonely. And Maisy Gibbons was willing to help them

Mary Alice

Every morality play has its cast of characters. There is always an innocent victim...a deceitful villain...a prosecutor who seeks the truth...a magistrate that dispenses justice...and a lawyer who charges too much

Mary Alice

No one knew where Martha Huber was, and Edie Britt was starting to worry. Edie didn't like worrying. She felt it gave her wrinkles. So, out of concern for her face and Mrs. Huber, Edie decided to find out what was going on

Mary Alice

Bree: Were you with a woman? Did you tell her that you have a wife or does that hinder your pick-up style?
Rex: All right. Even if I was seeing someone, I have every right to. Exploring options is the whole point of being separated!
Bree: Options?! I'm not a mutual fund, Rex

Just came form my cardiologist and all four valves are working. If he'd just marry my ex, or if anyone would, I'd be utopic. Is that a word? Utopic?

Murray