Quotes
The tinier the train the more concentrated the fun.
Sheldon
Bernadette: I'm not going to live with your mother. Not now. Not ever.
Howard: Somebody, obviously, has some mommy issues.
I've seen pictures of your mother. Keep eating.
Sheldon [to Penny]
There's something about an underdog that really inspires the unexceptional.
Robert
Andy: Ow, ow!
Tattoo Artist: That was just the cotton swab.
Andy: Invest in softer cotton, sir.
Let's ink my stink!
Andy
I guess you could say I'm in one of those ass tattoo incentive situations.
Andy
Andy: You think it has anything to do with the incentive program?
Jim: Oh absolutely. People wanna see you tattoo your ass.
Your friend Neil Patrick Harris really made me laugh the other night.
Dwight (to Oscar)
Snooki: This whole time I'm depressed because of you. And I'm not being myself.
Jionni: So why are you with me?
Snooki: I don't know, I'm asking myself that question right now.
Jionni: What do you mean you're not being yourself. You're drunk seven days a week, you're hooking up with girls and you're dancing in your underwear, that's not you?
Vinnie's in purple pants. And I don't know how I feel about it.
Sammi
Annie: She reminds me of a younger me.
Troy: You mean the younger you that took so much Adderall she tried to straighten the lines of the football field in the middle of the game?