Clyde: Did you mean to say you are a crazy country?
Marty: That's auto correct. But the word's still there. If she read it out loud, she'll get it.

Soo, maybe not just father issues?

Beverly

My type is smart, beautiful, slightly damaged. Know anyone like that?

Helen

Ah, Judge Miller. Your reputation precedes you. I would say it's a pleasure but my mother taught me never to lie.

Nolan

Marty: When are you going to rape and pillage my company?
Denna: I'd rather stick to raping and pillaging you.
Marty: Boo, don't threaten me with a good time.

That's the best thing to happen to rubber since tires!

Matt

Clyde: You know when Mommy and Daddy fight, it hurts me in my no no place.
Doug: Your dick!

She always looks like she smelled it.

Carol

When baby goes poopie, we're supposed to make a big fuss.

Marty

Helen: Do you ever get high?
Carol: Once in a while!

Calm down, it's not like there's a dick in it!

Matt

Emily: Jack tends to keep things inside.
Ben: I'm getting worried. What happens when he runs out of space in there?