Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 1 Episode 4: "Teacher's Pet" Quotes
Dr. Gregory: I know you can excel in this class, and so I expect no less. Is that clear?
Buffy: Yeah. Sorry.
Dr. Gregory: Don’t be sorry. Be smart. And please don’t listen to the principal or anyone else’s negative opinion about you. Let’s make him eat that permanent record. What do you say?
Buffy: Okay, thanks.
I don’t know what to say. It was really, I mean, one minute you’re in your normal life and then, “Who’s in the fridge?!” It really gets to you with a thing like that. It was...let’s just say I haven’t been able to eat a thing since yesterday. I think I lost like seven and a half ounces! Way swifter than that so-called diet that quack put me on. Oh, I’m not saying that we should kill a teacher every day so I can lose weight. I’m just saying when tragedy strikes we have to look on the bright side, you know? Like, how even used Mercedes have leather seats.
Cordelia
Giles: Well, basically, the She-Mantis assumes the form of a beautiful woman and lures innocent virgins back to her nest.
Buffy: Virgins?! Well, Xander’s not...uh...uh...I mean he’s probably...
Willow: He’s gonna die!
[Willow gets up and leaves]
Miss French: Can I ask you a personal question? Have you ever been with a woman before?
Xander: You mean like in the same room?
Miss French: You know what I mean.
Xander: Oh that, well, let me think. Yeah, there was several, and I mean quite a few times. And then there was...oh, she was incredibly...no, uh huh.
Miss French: I know, I can tell.
Xander: You can?
Miss French: Oh, I like it. You might say...I need it.
Buffy: Any luck?
Giles: I’ve not found any creature as of yet that strikes terror in a vampire’s heart.
Buffy: Try looking under “things that can turn their heads all the way around.”
Giles: Nothing human can do that.
Buffy: Nothing human...but there are some insects that can. Whatever she is, I’m going to be ready for her.
Giles: What are you gonna do?
Buffy: My homework.
