Don't bother sleeping with my husband tonight. You're already screwed.


You need to become even more narcissistic than ever before.

Sue [to Rachel]

If I were't ignoring what these ladies were saying, due to my deep repulsion, I'd encourage you to go for it.


Sue: Anything else?
Brittany: Sometimes I forget my middle name.

It's my understanding you've been given the heave-ho by that terribly uncoordinated Finn Hudson.


Rachel: Good luck winning without me.
Kurt: Everyone is replaceable, even you.

Thank you for the coffee. And the making out? Pretty hot.


Are you gay? Because most of the show choir directors I make out with are gay.

Ms. Corcoran

It's like watching beige paint drop... I want a look that's so optimistic, it could cure cancer.

Ms. Corcoran

I'm engorged with venom, and triumph.


You may be two of the stupidest teens I've ever encountered - and that's saying something. I once taught a cheerleading seminar to Sarah Palin.


We know our Romeo and Juliet romance will be an issue. But our true respect for each other's talent will carry us through.


Glee Season 1 Quotes

What if I were to innocently murder you, Will? I'd still have to go to trial. I'd still probably get off for justifiable homicide.


God, it feels good to finally pop that zit known as Will Schuester.