Also, I have a razor blade in my hair.

Santana

You just got poked. Poked by the Pink Dagger.

Sandy

I just don't get it, why are you a bigger star than me?

Mercedes

I spent three years sending hate mail to Debbie Gibson until she wrote me back and said the stress of my letters was giving her alopecia.

Holly

My curly hair in Cairo twitter account helped bring down Mubarak. Technology has allowed us to be brutally cruel without suffering any consequences.

Jacob

Blaine: We could have handled that.
Santana: It was more fun doing it together.

Let me tell you something about Will Schuester. That guy has tiny baby hands. Seriously, it's weird. Once I saw him try and pick up a Big Mac, he couldn't do it. He had to eat it layer by layer. Teeny, tiny, wee baby hands.

Dustin

I'm handsome, I'm good looking and I'm easy on the eyes. Also, I'm gorgeous.

Dustin

This hairline is 85% my own and my sperm count is off the charts.

Dustin

Tomorrow we're going to do Catherine the Great and her pet stallion friend so come early!

Holly

I had giant hands so a lot of people thought I was a hermaphrodite but that wasn't true. Other people said that I was a Nazi sympathizer, that was true.

Holly

At what age are you allowed to look back on your life with nothing but regret?

Emma

Glee Season 2 Quotes

Even if your team has dropped their sequin-covered panties and urinated all over the stage like an elderly Carol Channing, they literally could not have done worse.

Sue

One girl ate a pigeon. That's how badly they wanna be Cheerios.

Sue