You're always singing about R.E.S.P.E.C.T. but respect isn't something you can ask for, you have to demand it.


Sandy how do you manage to enter a building without setting off all of the fire alarms?


You're hunky and I'm what they call predatory gay.


Brittany was the only person we could find on short notice. We bribed her with Dots.


Classroom to classroom, door to door, we pushed this stuff like crack and so will we.


It looks like a Jewish cloud. *petting Jacob Ben-Israel's hair*


Rachel: Kurt, I need to talk to you about something.
Kurt: Oh, please not another pregnancy.
Rachel: Kurt, we have a lot more in common than you think.
Kurt: That's a terrible thing to say.

Sue: And as you ponder your decision, I ask that you remember that that cannon has 2 little baby twin cannons, and one more on the way, and if you refuse to sign this, well, those little baby cannons might just go hungry.
Brittany: Baby cannons...
Sue: And the mama cannon has fibromyalgia so she can't work.

Santana: Uhh, Mr. Schue I have another verse of "Trouty Mouth"
Sam: *holds up notebook with the words: "Hell No"*

I've cheated twice. The first time I got pregnant. The second time I got mono.


Holly: So I hear you guys are having problems.
Emma: We're not having problems
Carl: Yes we are
Holly: Okay when is the last time you guys-
Carl: Never.
Holly: I beg your pardon
Carl: We never
Holly: Girlfriend what is up with that?!? He's hot! Your 30.
Emma: I know, but we watch the Housewives dramas which are so so racy.
Carl: I tried. I make her dinner. I give her roses and everytime i do this-*tickles Emma* that happens.
Holly: Okay I'm not a doctor. I don't even like watching doctor shows. Except the ones where they strap bombs around their chests. I love those! So I'm going to ask you a question and be honest. Are you still in love with Will Schuester?
Carl: I was thinking the same thing but I was afraid to ask.
Emma: I'm very confused of my feelings right now.
Carl: Well, your feelings can stay at the condo and mine are going to the hotel. Thanks doctor. *leaves*
Holly: Not a doctor.
Emma: Please don't tell Will.
Holly: No of course not. My lips are sealed. Just like your legs. Wow, gosh, sorry, how rude. Why did I say that? You know a real doctor would have never said that.

Finn: Break a leg.
Rachel: Last time we were here you told me you loved me.

Glee Season 2 Quotes

You just got poked. Poked by the Pink Dagger.


The glee club together with the football team, it's like a double rainbow. A zombie double rainbow.