OK. Just for the record? These are not the world's best waffles.

Zeek

Amber: What's the apartment like?
Drew: Sad. It's like a whole complex of Uncle Joels.

Max: I hate the other kids.
Amber: I understand. I had some pretty rough times in middle school myself.
Max: Not this rough.

To keep my kid at home. Not the kid who pissed in his canteen. You're gonna punish my kid? This is asinine.

Kristina

Really? You had a negative outlook about something? That's a shocker.

Sarah

Asperger's is supposed to make me smart, but if I'm smart then why don't I get why they're laughing at me?

Max

Hank: I do. I do have the wrong idea.
Sarah: What do you mean?
Hank: There's a million Bravermans out there. Every corner there's a Braverman. They're like Starbucks. But you come here. You come to me. Every time. Why? I'm getting the wrong idea. I got the wrong idea.

Alright, I'm sad. I'm sad about Amy and I want to smoke week and write bad songs.

Drew

Joel: You should have just seen him, Julia, he's melting down in front of me and I feel like all these abandonment issues are coming back and...
Julia: Because you moved out.

Zeek: Well, let me ask you something. What the hell are you doing?
Joel: What the hell am I doing? Well, I'm trying to figure things out, you know? Figuring things out.

What I did not know was that I was runner up when it came to godfather.

Adam

Why is she calling? I don't want to answer. Oh my God. What if grandpa died! Don't laugh.

Amber

Parenthood Season 5 Quotes

That's my motto for life - I'm just in it for the sugar.

Hank

Max: I walked, during my radius, that I can walk to on my own. The idea is that I build autonomy so that eventually I'll be able to move out and support myself. Also, eventually, they're going to die, so I'm going to need to learn to live on my own anyway.
Hank: Hmm. That's touching.