Olive: It's like we're trapped in a sachet in a panty drawer of a dead shut-in, who was shut in her bedroom by her cat so that it would have to smell the scene of Freesia. Can't you smell it?
Chuck: Yeah. That would be my Freesia hair detangler that you said smells amazing yesterday.
Olive: Wish I hadn't now.

Veronica: I want "Yustice" at any price.
Calista:: That's our kind of yustice. We'll be in touch.

Olive: Know what you want?
Calista: Yeah. Nothing', with a size of "buzz off."

The firm of Cod & Cod dedicated itself to the pursuit of truth at all costs... a pursuit young Emerson found "badass."

Narrator

Emerson: What got thee to a nunnery?
Olive: Oh, Emerson. You really want to know?
Emerson: Not especially. That was just my attempt at polite wee talk. Moment's passed, so let's talk compensation.

Emerson: I'm Father Dowling. These are my associates: Father Mulcahy and Sister Christian.

(after re-killing Sister Larue) We are so going to hell.

Ned

Emerson: Rule Number One: don't buy fish on Monday. Rule Number Two: Don't poke an angry German.

Chuck: If Mother Superior found Larue's shiny stash...
Ned: Then all it would take was one push, and the convent would be back... in black.
Chuck: By-proxy high-five.
Emerson: Get, before I by-proxy vomit.

There are Commandments! We follow all ten, and I am commanding you to stop!

Olive

Chuck: There was a young man named Von Deenis...
Ned: Who they said had a very big...

I could throw up in my mouth a little and not even know the difference.

Olive

Pushing Daisies Season 2 Quotes

I could have been swarmed in my underwear.

Ned

Chuck: Don't offend the bees.
Ned: How would I offend the bees?