Riverdale
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on The CWRiverdale Season 2 Quotes
Jughead: Hello?
Cheryl: How’s the lake house? Are you all settled in and spooning yet?
Jughead: Who is this?
Cheryl: It’s Cheryl, you welfare baby.
Jughead: Is something wrong?
Cheryl: Not yet. I just wanna make sure you know that Archie and Betty kissed in front of my house right before Christmas and it seemed plenty serious, like with tongue serious. That’s all! Enjoy your couples-only weekend, kisses to all. Bye now!
[He hangs up the phone]
Archie: Mrs. Lodge, I...would never ever do anything to betray your family. I swear.
Hermione: So you’ve proven to me these last few weeks. Hiram and I, unbeknownst to our daughter, enlisted one of our closest associates to approach you, say he was an FBI agent investigating Hiram. Agent Adams isn’t real. He works for me. One of my capos. I asked him to apply a lot of pressure to you, threaten your father even. See if you would crack.
Archie: Wait, this whole thing, it was all some kind of test?
Hermione: Yes, it was...and you passed. Welcome to the family, Archie.
Cheryl: Back so soon, Mr. Cooper?
Hal: Cheryl, what are you doing there sitting in the dark?
Cheryl: Do you know my mother is a harlot, don’t you? A modern day ‘Mofflanders’?
[She gets up from her chair]
Cheryl: What you’re doing could destroy your family. That’s why I’m not going to tell Betty, but I suggest you hurry home to your wife and daughter before I change my mind.
FP: It’s done.
Jughead: Jeez, Dad, you reek.
FP: It’s sodium-hydroxide. In a week there will be nothing left...nothing but his teeth.
[He grabs Alice’s hand]
Alice: Thank you, FP. I’m sorry for involving Betty, and that she pulled Jughead into this.
FP: We take care of our own. The circle ends here. No more loose ends.
Betty: You lied to us! That shady guy wasn’t one of your customers, he was a drug dealer. It’s all in here, hundreds of messages from junkies looking for a fix, including one from Chic the night of.
[She shows the phone]
Alice: Betty, why in God’s name would you go back there?
Betty: To make sure in broad daylight that no one could see him from the trail.
Alice: Okay, give that back to me before someone tracks that back to the house.
Betty: No, Mom, I already turned off the GPS and you’re missing the whole point here. Chic lied to us about the shady guy. What else is he lying about, huh?
[Chic stars crying]
Betty: Excuse me? Are you kidding me?! NO ONE is buying the waterworks!
Alice: That’s enough, Elizabeth.
Archie: The man who ordered the poutine. I overheard him at the poker game and I think he’s planning something bad. He said you’re getting sloppy and...and that action needs to be taken. I’m telling you, Mr. Lodge, so you can protect yourself in case there’s some kind of coup.
[Hiram turns around slowly]
Hiram: Thank you, Archie. You can go back to the party now. Check on my daughter. I hear she’s having a good time.
[Archie leave and Hiram sits at his desk]
FP: Penny’s a cobra, but mutilating her...that’s the kinda thing you don’t come back from, Jug.
Jughead: Yeah, like stuffing a teenager’s body in a freezer.
[FP gets frustrated and pushes something]
FP: Keep your mouth shut! Tall Boy was right. You brought the Northside down on us! Serpents are losing their dens because of what you what you wrote.
Jughead: [Jughead throws something] And yourself! You’re using my article, and they’re using what happened to the statue of General Pickens, as an excuse to justify something they’ve already been doing.
FP: What? You think you’re a hero, Jug?! Cutting up women, bringing the temple down right on our damn heads. You...will be the death of us. Not the Northside. Not Penny. You.
FP: What’s your price, Penny?
Penny: Blood for blood. An eye for an eye. I want back in with the Serpents, and I want him kicked out.
[She looks to Jughead]
Penny: Oh yeah, one last thing, I want his tattoo carved off and I wanna do it myself...with a dirty knife.
Jughead: Why did you do it? Did someone put you up to it?
Tall Boy: Why is the Northsider here? This is Serpent business and this is Serpent land.
Jughead: She’s here because she’s one of us.
FP: You didn’t answer my son’s question. Why did you do it?!
Tall Boy: Because I am tired of seeing the Serpents going soft under your rule. And Hiram Lodge came by and wanted to stir up some trouble, he said if I took the hit he’d get McCoy and the cops to swerve all over us and cause some chaos.
Jughead: So, Hiram Lodge asked you to start a mutiny and you helped him? Why?
Tall Boy: Figured it’d be my change to get rid of you, Sunshine.
Jughead: This town is messed up and it needs to own up to its history.
Toni: My grandfather isn’t some bnroken down victim or some prop for your insane vendetta against the Northside.
Jughead: Of course not!
Toni: Look, I get it. You hate the Northside. You hate that instead of inviting you to a party, they asked you to work it. It triggers all your rage of being born on the wrong side of the tracks. But this!
[She holds up the newspaper]
Toni: This wasn’t your story to tell.
[She leaves]
Hiram: What are you waiting for?
Archie: Mr. Lodge, it’s not funny.
Hiram: Come on.
[They wrestle and Hiram puts Archie in a chokehold]
Hiram: This is a symbol of a disrespectful and powerful move. When your opponent gets cocky, dominating your rival, demoralizing him is the key if you want to win.
[He leans in whisper to Archie]
Hiram: Get the message? I. Always. Win.
Chic: We’ll start with why I webcam. One of the reasons is to make money. The other reason is...to escape.
Betty: To pretend to be someone else.
Chic: Yes, but...more than that...it’s a way of getting away from the darkness I feel inside me too.
[Betty looks at the scars on her palm]
Betty: Can you show me how to do that?
[He opens up his laptop]
