Scandal
Thursdays 9:00 PM on ABCFavorite Scandal Quotes
Huck: If I kill Hollis Doyle for you, you can't come back here. You can't work for Pope and Associates anymore. You can't be a gladiator.
Quinn: Why not?
Huck: Because you want Hollis dead for revenge and we don't do revenge. We solve problems. So you can be Lindsey Dwyer and get revenge on Hollis or you can be Quinn Perkins and move on with your life. You can't have your new life and also keep your old life. It doesn't work that way. So which is it?
[to Fitz] Many a man has been undone by jealousy.
Cyrus
Fitz: What are you thinking? Who are you right now?
Olivia: The woman who got you elected. So go be the man I voted for.
Harrison: Shut it down.
Quinn: I'm sorry?
Harrison: I saw you on your date last night.
Quinn: I don't knwo what you're talking about.
Harrison: You're lying, which isn't the problem. The problem is you suck at it. Every time you do it, you look like you're about to cry. You look like you're about to cry right now.
Quinn: I'm not going to.
Harrison: Now. You can't keep seeing this guy. There's going to come a time when you're going to have to lie to him to protect a client, and we don't lie to reporters, because once you do there's no going back. You've killed the one thing you protect at all costs--your credibility. And not just your credibility, my credibility. This firm's credibility. And that's not going to happen. So save yourself the trouble and shut it down.
You're ticking, sir. You're ticking. You know how I know you're ticking? Up until you saw this picture, you've been happy. Lately, you've been happy, and don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed it. Not because of the happiness but because it's been weird, like seeing a grandma in a bikini or a Democrat with a Bible. You're happy, but we both know that happy people are rarely actually happy, unless they're morons. You are a brilliant man, a Rhodes scholar and a PhD, which means you're acting happy because she won't take your calls, and you won't admit that it bothers you and god knows what else that goes on in the Shakespearean drama that is the women in your life. You're ticking, sir. You're a bomb stuffed in a teddy bear waiting to explode.
Cyrus
Cyrus: "Let's be clear about something. I run a sausage factory."
Fitz: "Which makes me...sausage?"
Cyrus: "Handsome, highly qualified, smart, idealistic and energetic sausage. The stumping, electrifying speeches, baby kissing--that's all you. The nitty-gritty, morally bankrupt, back alley brawling rest of the game, that's me--it's filthy and thankless and it's my hallelujah, heroin, and reason to breathe and you--you don't have half the stomach for it."
I'm asking you to be an adult. Stop holding your breath. Quit stomping your feet. It's time to pick up your toys like a good girl and act like the First Lady of the United States of America.
Cyrus
You're not the fixer here, Liv. You're the problem. You're the client. You're my client. Like it or not. So I'm not asking for the truth. I know the truth. I know enough. At any minute, any second now, so will the rest of planet Earth. So what I'm asking you is, what is your end game? Because the eye will pass, the winds will kick up, and you are not tethered to anything.
Harrison
Olivia: Are you hacking?
Huck: Would you like me to explain it?
Olivia: That would ruin it for both of us.
Olivia: Huck, you know I don't drink coffee.
Huck: It's a gesture. It means I'm sorry about Quinn. People get people coffee when they're sorry. I can get you tea instead.
Artie Hornbacher played us. For two days he wagged our dog. I'm not proud of that. But he played you for 16 years. Who knows what secrets he stole along the way, right out from underneath your nose. What a great story! The kind of story that leads to Congressional hearings and mass firings and books and movies. Juicy stuff.
Olivia
Abby: It makes no sense. Do you buy it?
Harrison: I question she's lying about her alibi, but I have a hard time buying her as some Unabomber freak who could mix Clorox and toothpaste and blow up half an office park. No offense, Huck.
Huck: None taken.
