Cartman: Don't worry, Tweek. Your family can go on welfare. Kenny's family's on welfare and they're happy, isn't that right, Kenny?
Kenny: (muffled) F**K you!

• Permalink: Don't worry, Tweek. Your family can go on welfare. Kenny's famil...
• Added: February 16, 2010

This is too much pressure. AHH!!

</i> Tweek

• Permalink: This is too much pressure. AHH!!
• Added: February 16, 2010

They really have my balls in a juice maker.

Mr. Tweek

• Permalink: They really have my balls in a juice maker.
• Added: February 16, 2010

They really have my balls in a salad shooter.

Mr. Tweek

• Permalink: They really have my balls in a salad shooter.
• Added: February 16, 2010

They really have my balls in a vice grip.

Mr. Tweek

• Permalink: They really have my balls in a vice grip.
• Added: February 16, 2010

We've been using these poor kids to pull at your heartstrings for our cause. We're as low and despicable as Rob Reiner.

Mrs. Tweek

• Permalink: We've been using these poor kids to pull at your heartstrings fo...
• Added: February 16, 2010

Stan: Damn, dude this place is huge.
Kyle: Yeah, it's almost as big as Cartman's ass.
Cartman: (annoyed) No it isn't you guys.

• Permalink: Damn, dude this place is huge. Yeah, it's almost as big as Car...
• Added: February 16, 2010

Kyle: Does anybody know anything about corporations?
Cartman: I think my mom is a corporation.
Stan: (sarcastically) Yeah, that makes sense.

• Permalink: Does anybody know anything about corporations? I think my mom ...
• Added: February 16, 2010

(Mr. Tweek keeps talking like a coffee commercial)
Tweek: Dad!
Mr. Tweek: What?
Tweek: The metaphors, man!
Mr. Tweek: Oh, sorry.

• Permalink: Dad! What? The metaphors, man! Oh, sorry.
• Added: February 16, 2010

Kyle: Do you ever think maybe you shouldn't give your son coffee?
Mrs. Tweek: Why would you say that?
Kyle: Well, look at him. He's always shaky and nervous.
Mrs. Tweek: Oh, that. He has A.D.D., attention defecit disorder. That's why he's so jittery all the time.

• Permalink: Do you ever think maybe you shouldn't give your son coffee? Wh...
• Added: February 16, 2010