Howard: Oh, come on-- she could have a freezer full of ex-boyfriend's body parts and you'd still go out with her.
Raj: I do like that the ex-boyfriend's out of the picture.

Penny: Hey, I don't understand why you're not upset with Amy.
Sheldon: I am. So much so that I'm gonna bring her here for dinner on our next date night.

But to be fair, when you talk, most of what you say sounds like, "Wah, wah, wah, clothes".

Sheldon

Sheldon: I don't understand my food. Chinese noodles with Korean barbecue ... in a taco.
Penny: It's fusion.
Sheldon: Well, my mother would lock her car doors if she had to drive through this hodgepodge of ethnicity.

Amy and Bernadette. Amy and Bernadette. Amy and Bernadette. Why did you lie to us?!

Sheldon

Sheldon: So, we're just randomly choosing a restaurant without researching it online?
Penny: Yep.
Sheldon: Great. You know, this is how Anything Can Happen Thursday turns into It Won't Stop Coming Up Friday.

Raj: You know, when Cinnamon won't take her medicine, I hide it in a piece of cheese.
Howard: Good idea. We can wrap the pill in cheese, feed it to Cinnamon, and then my mom can eat Cinnamon.

Leonard: All right. I officially reinstate Anything Can Happen Thursday.
Penny: Great! What do, what do you want to do?
Sheldon: I don't know. What do you want to do?
Penny: I don't know. What do you want to do?
Leonard: I'm starting to remember the problem with Anything Can Happen Thursdays.

I have to go to the gas station across the street. I mean, I was dressed like half an ape and still not even close to the most disgusting person in there.

Penny

Penny: So, we're about to shoot this scene in the movie where the killer ape DNA is slowly taking over my body.
Leonard: Okay.
Penny: But I realize they're gluing fur everywhere, except my cleavage. So, I asked
the director why and he says, it's important to the story that my boobs be the last things to turn ape.
Leonard: It's sweet that he thinks there's a story.


Amy: Maybe you could make your new field of study the calculation
of nuclear matrix elements.
Sheldon: Oh, please. If I wanted to take up a fad, I'd get a tramp stamp.

What a jackass.

Stephen Hawking

The Big Bang Theory Season 7 Quotes

Howard: There's a party for incoming post-docs tonight. Go to it and meet someone who isn't made of grease or pie.
Raj: You think you're so cool because your wife is a person?

Sheldon: Even the dung beetle chooses to plot its course by using the Milky Way.
Raj: Is that true?
Sheldon: Everything I say is true. Now, of course, the dung beetle also enjoys eating fece, living in feces and making little balls out of feces. So, pick and choose which aspects of its lifestyle you want to embrace.