The Mysteries of Laura Quotes
Laura: Yesterday you had forgot that an entire conversation had taken place.
Jake: I have a minor heart condition as a result of the shooting.
Jake: You are one hell of a liar.
Laura: Thank you. I learned from the best.
Are you kidding me?! Seven dollars for a box of crackers. Do you have a layaway program?
Don't punish with silence, I can't take it.
Max
Our parents gave us logic problems at dinner, didn't solve it, no dessert.
Meredith
Jake: I don't see a phone, do you?
Laura: Nope, which is very weird cause kids these days are surgically tethered to their phones.
You like the graph? I was thinking pie chart but at the last minute I went with the graph.
Max
Laura: When you have kids you'll understand.
Meredith: [laughing] Kids? I'm not even seeing anyone.
Laura: [clearly knows something] Of course you're not.
[talking about Nina] She went from having no one to being showered with affection and support.
Just because you write something in dry erase marker doesn't make it true.
Laura: Why do you think we doubled our life insurance once we started working together?
Jake: We doubled our life insurance when we started working together?
Laura: [pausing for a moment] I doubled our life insurance.
Jake: Is that a hickey on your neck?
Laura: You know what? Just don't look at my neck, look at your own neck.
