Alan: It wasn't a nut house, it was a stress clinic.
Jake: What's the difference?
Alan: About $2500 / week.

Alan: Oh thank god I'm still in a looney bin.
Gary Busey: It's a stress clinic.

I'm soaking wet and i had to give a truck driver half a handy to get here.

Alan

Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 8 Quotes

I'm soaking wet and i had to give a truck driver half a handy to get here.

Alan

Alan: Oh thank god I'm still in a looney bin.
Gary Busey: It's a stress clinic.