Popular Joel McHale Quotes
So this is how Greendale graduates end up--as transient mountain men. Not as bad as I thought.
Jeff
You ruined Christmas dinner so that you could be crowned the smartest person at the dumbest school?
Jeff
Jeff: It's Macallan 18. I like to serve it neat, if that's okay with you.
Professor Cornwallis: What, in America? Don't you mix it with cherry pop or Monterey Jack cheese?
Britta: So you just left your section blank.
Jeff: No, of course not! I copied and pasted the lyrics to "War (What Is It Good For)."
Holy makes-complete-sense-at-this-school!
Jeff
Pierce: What do you want me to do?
Jeff: Stay alive...or don't!
Pierce: I'm on it!
Maintenance Guy: Sorry, routine light switch check.
Jeff: That is not a thing!
Shirley: Is this a bad time?
Dean Pelton (speaking as Jeff): I'm at Greendale, stuck in the body of a man who could be Gollum, so yeah, I'd say it's half past suck.
Dean Pelton: Which is to say that having Jeffrey inside of me-
Jeff: No one was inside of anyone!
Dean Pelton: -was wrong. To have Jeffrey inside of me.
Abed, we don't have origin stories, we have lives. At least...yup, just me.
Jeff
I've spent almost four years here, growing and changing and making dioramas.
Jeff
Annie, why are you acting like a mistress in a Lifetime movie?
Jeff
