The Millers Quotes

Tom: You’re right. Our marriage does deserve a better send-off. Carol Miller, will you do me the honor of unmarrying me? Carol: You’ve…

Carol: Our marriage almost last 50 years, and we’re going to end it with a couple of signatures, like we’re renting a car.

Carol: Wait a second, are you watching Game of Thrones? You can’t like Game of Thrones. Tom: Why not? Carol: Because I like Game of…

What is this? No fault divorce? This isn’t a no fault divorce! We need one that says his fault divorce.

Nathan: I’m all set for my Mom and Dad to sign the divorce papers. The snacks are out. You’re getting the drinks, and I’ve got 911 on…

Carol: You’re really going for the low-hanging fruit. I’m surprised they go for yours.

Kip: You’re barking up the wrong gay with this guy.

Carol: He never let you have closure. What kind of a man breaks up a marriage over a text-a-gram?

Kip: Straight lips. Straight lips. Straight lips.

Carol: How did it go? Nathan: We’re dating. Carol: Are you being facetious? If not, I owe your Dad 20 bucks.