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House Recap: "Broken"

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They didn't break me. I am broken.

Did House viewers ever expect those words to come out of the mouth of the show's main character?

Moreover, could any fan of this Fox series have expected more from a season premiere than last night's incredible two-hour installment? It played like a movie, as no other show on television could have pulled off such a feat.

Featuring only one main character, in an entirely new setting, "Broken" showcased Hugh Laurie at his best. It's hard to do it justice with an episode recap, but we tried. Follow the preceding link for a complete rundown.

Doctors Clash

Among the many tremendous House quotes from last night, a few of our favorites:

Dr. Nolan: Why do you value your failures more than your successes?
House: My mother caught me masturbating... to pictures of her mother.
Dr. Nolan: Can we get past these cute deflections? | permalink
Dr. Nolan: You having fun?
House: I did connect with one guy. But the my propensity for screwing things up overtook me. Then my desire to have fun overcame my propensity. | permalink
House: I see you've got some cello in your trunk. And no, that's not a euphemism. | permalink
House: I'm sick of being miserable. | permalink

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House Quotes

People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get. There's nothing any of us can do about it.

House

House: Lift up your arms. You have a parasite.
Jill: Like a tapeworm or something?
House: Lie back and lift up your sweater. You can put your arms down.
Jill: Can you do anything about it?
House: Only for about a month or so. After that it becomes illegal to remove, except in a couple of states.
Jill: Illegal?
House: Don't worry. Many women learn to embrace this parasite. They name it, dress it up in tiny clothes, arrange playdates with other parasites...
Jill: Playdates...
House: (showing her sonogram) It has your eyes.