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The Bachelor Review: Who Can Bang Jake the Best Edition

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Jake Pavelka took his three remaining women on The Bachelor to St. Lucia last night. There were fantasy suite cards and obligatory STUNNING bombshells dropped.

If you require a rundown, here's our recap of Week Seven.

But in truth you can probably sum it up with the review below, as this is a two-hour show with about 30 minutes of actual content. Is ABC really stretched that thin?

Anyway, post-jump, we've got the highlights in our review ...

Jake

Who made Jake Pavelka's final two and who went home?

Gia came in as the underdog as Jake whittled the field to three last week. Ali probably would have made it over her had she decided to stay. More on that in a few moments.

Ali is regretting her decision to leave the show, or at least pretending that's the case for the sake of ABC's cameras. She's mulling whether she just made the biggest mistake.

Gia and Jake exchange platitudes and possibly bodily fluids in the fantasy suite. She's hot, clearly he digs her, but there's no way she is getting a rose tonight. Just no way.

Tenley is still very sweet and kind. She talks about her ex-husband a lot but that's the character they've developed for her, so we accept that. She goes to the suite as well.

Without question, Tenley Molzahn has been a favorite from the beginning. But can she possibly contend with Jake's other obvious favorite (for reasons unknown to anyone)?

Vienna is the girl Jake is going to pick at the end. Come on. For whatever reason he loves Vienna Girardi no matter how lame she acts or what the other girls say. Too bad.

Ali then decides she wants a second chance, and Jake pretends to mull it over before saying he's so much closer to the other girls since she left. Sorry Ali... really Jake?

In other words, all hype but just filler. Pretty weak, really, seeing as at least The Bachelorette stretched out Ed's fake exit a bit longer. Roses: Tenley, Vienna. Gone: Gia.

Who will Jake pick among his final two? Does Tenley stand a chance?

Review

Editor Rating: 2.0 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 3.6 / 5.0 (11 Votes)

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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