Last night's Gossip Girl, "Juliet Doesn't Live Here Anymore," pitted insiders against outsiders, as TVF's official review notes, setting the stage for an epic battle next week.

Now it's time for one of our favorite pieces of Gossip Girl coverage, N.Y. Magazine's trademark reality index. Excerpts from the site's take on Monday's high and low points:

• Let’s see if we can decipher Dan’s stated reasoning for reading Colin’s book: “Serena has boobs.” Yeah, okay, we get it. Plus 2.
• Serena to Dan: “Why do you have mad face?” Plus 1. His expression was so ridiculous he might as well have said out loud, “I AM WEARING MY MAD FACE.” (Which, by the way, is the same as his smug face.)
• Colin and Juliet appear to be exactly the same age. And yet Colin is a spectacularly wealthy CEO and Juliet is a student? Minus 3.
• Vanessa hunted down Juliet after seeing she checked in to Ollie's. Of course Foursquare is the weak spot in her fake life scheme. Plus 1.
• Lordy lordy, Chuck in Blair’s velvet robe! Plus 1.

• Plus 20 for when the dean turns to Vanessa and says what we’ve been dying to say for years now: “I’m sorry, who are you?”
• Yay, another episode that ends with Chair sex! Plus 2, especially for the moment when they stop hugging and literally smell one another.
• Colin: “You promised you weren’t in contact with Ben.” Juliet: “It’s not that easy for him!” “Prison shouldn’t be easy,” Colin says. “Especially when you deserve to be there.” Minus 3, because we feel like WE deserve to be there.
• Colin and Serena’s breakup conversation ends because the hallway ends. Not because they resolved anything. Minus 2.

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.