Gossip Girl Review: Call Me Serena!
If nothing else, the Russell Thorpe story line can no longer be called boring.
In the first installment of Gossip Girl's two-part season finale, Bart's old partner was exposed as a sociopath and possible murderer - one setting his sights on the ultimate revenge, holding the one thing Chuck truly covets in life in a precarious position.
Let's backtrack and break down how Russell and Blair ended up on the roof ...
Despite predictable developments and serious plot holes, "Shattered Bass" was entertaining for the most part and featured some terrific cameos and one-liners.
Blair and Louis' love affair is in full bloom, although I certainly didn't sense a lot of chemistry between them this week. Partly because B was seeing Chuck a lot.
She spends a lot of time worrying about Chuck for someone supposedly so enthralled with Louis, doesn't she? The writers sure glossed over Chuck's abuse fast.
Princess Sophie even had B tailed to prove that she was being dishonest with Louis. This begs the question: If she reveals her dark side, will he still want her?
He claims he will, but it looks far from certain. Those unsavory elements of B's personality are what forms the magnetism Chuck feels with Blair and vice versa.
Meanwhile, in thoroughly confusing Chuck news mostly redeemed by the return of Desmond Harrington as Jack, Raina called in Evil Uncle Bass. For REVENGE.
Jack then got in touch with Russell and plotted to take down Chuck, because Raina was to amateurish. Then Jack enlisted some thugs to force Chuck into rehab.
It's a good thing this was a setup - to trap Russell into rifling through Chuck's stuff with him supposedly locked away - because it was unrealistic on many levels.
Russell falling for it was amazing in a sense, but he was pretty desperate. The surveillance tape Russell wanted so hard didn't prove Bart Bass' guilt, but his own.
It was great, and admittedly unexpected, to see Jack take Chuck's side on this one, and noble of young Bass to let Russell walk with the same deal Bart had offered him.
Then Nate had to go and open his pretty mouth.
Having heard the truth from Nate, Raina called her dad to tell him he may as well be dead to her too. Betrayed, reeling and crazy, Russell hatched a plan for revenge.
Just as Chuck went to make a last-ditch effort to win over Blair at her public, royal debut with Louis, she was lured again by her star-crossed flame to Charlies' Place.
The roof of the hotel he's building, that is. Only Russell Thorpe awaited her, not Chuck. Will he bookend his career of torching buildings with Bass love interests inside?
Will Chuck stop him in the nick of time, only to win Blair's heart back from Louis? And is Raina's mom actually dead? We'll have to see when the season wraps May 16.
While all this was happening, Charlie went off her medication.
What she takes it for, why she stopped taking it, why she left evidence of not taking it in plain view, and how missing one dose made her NUTS in about three hours?
All very unclear. But that's where we're at right now.
After Dan invited Charlie to a fundraiser at Constance (which hilariously featured the return of Katy and Iz, along with those Gossip Girl fans who are like 12), Charlie freaked that she had nothing to wear, then showed up in Serena’s Cotillion dress!
This was absurdly awesome moment #1 of Charlie's story line: Serena's reaction and her cousin's insistence that it was a Nina Ricci number she bought once she got access to the Rhodes Trust Fund (another confusing plot element I won't get into).
Awesome moment #2? Charlie deciding she wants to get Humphreyed in Headmistress Queller’s office, slipping out of that dress like it was on fire, thrusting Serena-esque cleavage at Dan ... then breathlessly moaning for him to CALL HER SERENA!
Dan, understandably, backed off at that point.
While this would have been a top five Gossip Girl sex scene (maybe it even still counts, given some of the camera angles), Dan did the right thing coming to his sense there. The question is what happens next week when Charlie becomes even more unhinged.
Vanessa is coming to the rescue there, at least! Appearing out of nowhere and guaranteeing herself at least a 9 on this week's Gossip Girl Round Table, she and Serena called truce so they could share notes on Rufus and Charlie and her meds for some reason.
The more I write about it, the more I enjoyed some of the vintage Gossip Girl elements of this episode. By no means was it one of the show's best, but it'll be interesting to see how next week plays out and what note Season Four goes out on.
What did you think of last night's Gossip Girl? Discuss!