Gossip Girl Round Table: "Shattered Bass"

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Welcome back to the weekly TVF Gossip Girl Round Table, where our panel breaks down the previous night's episode (see our review from earlier this morning).

Below, GG critic Mister Meester is joined by Gossip Guy, TV Fanatic's President, programmer and accountant (among other titles) to discuss "Shattered Bass."

We're pleased to report that our colleague DANdy has returned to the U.S. in one piece, but is recovering from jet lag and being roofied by Jack Bass at this time.

It's a two-man show once again, sadly. But we'll give it our best:

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1. What was your favorite Gossip Girl quote from last night?

Gossip Guy: In honor of the return of the original Basshole, I have to go with the entire scene in which Jack nags Chuck to speed things up with Thorpe's arrest: "Can we call the cops soon? I'm hungry and all you seem to have are olives and hallucinogenic mushrooms."

Mister Meester: Anything out of Jack's mouth would be a good choice, but I'm giving it to Gossip Girl. She's either raiding Chuck's mushroom supply or just plain phoning it in these days with lines like this, after Charlie poured out her meds: "I don't think that's what the doctor meant when he said 'Use As Directed.'" That doesn't even make SENSE!

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2. Dan-Charlie sex scene: Hot, weird or unintentionally funny?

Gossip Guy: "Can you call me Serena?" Seriously Charlie? If you already need to role play in the first hookup, where do you picture things going down the road?

Mister Meester: Unintentionally funny that Charlie brazenly wanted to jump Dan's bones in the headmistress' office, then super hot when they both stripped down, then pretty darn weird when she wanted to be called Serena. Things got awkward pretty fast.

3. Harder to believe: Charlie going crazy after missing one dose of her mystery meds, that Blair and Louis are even engaged, or any part of the Russell/Chuck story?

Gossip Guy: Gonna 100% go with the Russel/Chuck/Bart storyline. They had me until Jack knew about Chuck's relationship with Raina from halfway across the world. What is he checking Gossip Girl's blog too? That was just silly.

Mister Meester: Blair and Louis have no chemistry, but he is nice and she loves a good fairy tale. Everything about the Russell Thorpe story arc is confusing, but at least his shadiness has sort of been put into context. But what the heck is Charlie's mental illness exactly? Why did she stop taking her medication? Why did that turn her into a lunatic in a matter of hours? All unclear.

Louis' Fiancee

ROYAL MESS: Blair nearly made one of her engagement by seeing Chuck.

4. Best guest star cameo last night: Cyrus, Jack or the original mean girls?

Gossip Guy: Sorry Cyrus and Jack, you guys have been always stolen my heart as guest stars and all, but Isabel and Katy!? What an amazing throwback to season one. Does anyone else remember when these girls were on the Gossip Girl Insider cast page? Hah, to think we thought they were going to be regulars and not just GG's attempts to diversify the pilot.

Mister Meester: All offered great continuity with past seasons, but did the mean girls forget Nelly Yuki? Weak. Jack ranting to hurry things up after they nailed Russell was awesome, but I'm still going with Cyrus, of whom there is never enough!

5: Rate last night on the Vanessa Uselessness Scale (1-10).

Gossip Guy: In honor of one of the greatest casting articles I've ever read, I'm going to give Vanessa a proper send off with 1. Let us always remember today as the new V-Day. February 14 was so 2010.

Mister Meester: 3. Mocking how useless she is has become too easy, and certainly loses some of its appeal now that Jessica Szohr kind of got fired. The only question is whether we rename this the Rufus or Nate Uselessness Scale for Season 5.

6: Will Blair choose the Prince or Chuck?

Gossip Guy: Definitely the Prince. Much like the little Gossip Girl fans in tonight's episode, we all know I stopped rooting for Chuck. And besides, Blair models herself after 1950s actresses. What's more fitting for her end game than following Grace Kelly and marrying a Prince of Monaco?

Mister Meester: Judging by this photo gallery from next week ... I still have no idea. But it doesn't look like B's too furious with her Dark Knight anymore. Just saying.

What do you think? Sound off in the comments!

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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I'm a nurse and like I said on the episode review page, if Charlie is taking antipsychotic (which she really seems too), missing one dose can be especially bad, bad enough to be hospitalized, so yeah, it makes sense for her to go crazy a little bit. And some people should chill the eff out with this Chair vs Dair war. It's becoming a little bit childish.

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Some people on this are so rude and nasty! Seriously its a tv programme- let people have their own opinions. Tbh chair has been a main selling point of gg so dont shoot people down if they like me love chair. Chair or no chair gg is still amazing! Even though the writers clearly had some problems clearly shown when louis came back to claim his 'love' whom he had known for like no time at alll.

Theyalier

BLAAAAAAAAAIR!
HOLLY SHIT. WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT WEEK???????????????????

Kimberly-anne

This episode was really good. There were parts that were moving really slowly like every scene with Dan and Charlie. I always knew she was psychotic and those pills in that odd shaped trash proves it.
So I just want to make this cleat…is Dair officially over? Because I want that to be TRUE so badly. I never rooted for them and never will so I hope they don’t happen again. And I seriously doubt what Vanessa said about Dan being a good kisser is true. I thought Vanessa got the internship aboard so why is she still here? I find it really awkward and fake that Serena would have a picture of her and Dan kissing at the Cotillion on her night stand if they are really over and that he is her step brother who she also shares a sibling with. I am so over the Thorpes because I cannot stand Nate and Raina and Russell. Nate and Raina are so boring together. He really is useless this season. I got lost when Russell was explaining what happened that day his wife died. So why is Jack and Chuck acting like family and not like real Bass men? I thought they hated each other and considering what happened the last time they met, and the fact that Jack made him lose Blair, I thought there was so way to fix their relationship, let only work together. So that gap in between needed a little more explaining. Although it was cute that they are family again. And Jack was hilarious when they were all interrogating Russell. Chuck got so annoyed that he looked like he was going to punch him every time he was interrupted. Yay!!!! Cyrus and Eleanor are back!!!! But no Dorota???? What???? Anyway, I’m surprise Eleanor didn’t freak out about the whole engagement. She seemed really happy about it. So does everyone in the show who has money also have their own spy or something? Because it seems that way. Louis’ mom had Blair followed, yet by simply talking with Cyrus, she all of a sudden became accepting of Blair? That’s a little over exasperating for me. Also, why didn’t Blair just call Chuck to let him known Jack is in the city. By leaving all of a sudden like that, of course she came off as being very suspicious. And Louis may be royalty but he’s an amateur at spying. Who spies on someone else in Brooklyn in a stretched limo? And why does his limo look so much like Chuck’s?
Anyway, I was so scared for Blair in the end. I wondered who called her at the party? I seriously thought for a second that it was Jack and that all he said about Chuck fighting for Blair were lies. But then when I saw Russell, I thought it was a great plot that connected with the beginning of the episode because she really is Chuck’s weakness according to Jack. I cannot wait to see what happens in the season finale.

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bring on Georgina, & she better not be in the last 5 minutes.

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1. "You have your own dark side"-Louis. Kuddos to Louis for having figure out something than took Nate forever to know and Dan used to know but he decided to delude himself about it this season. Louis barely knows Blair and he's too naive if he believes he's deeply in love with her after such short relationship, but at least he figured Blair's basic stuff. Pitty than when Blair said her line that maybe it would go away if they ignore it he only kissed her and didn't addressed it, because that is another major component of Blair's basic stuff. 2. I agree with Mister Meester. I'm looking forward for my friend who adores Dan/Penn to watch this scene, because I can't wait to see her reaction about the hot part. 3. Blair and Louis being engaged for unrealistic, specially considering the real life precedent of the Dukes of Cambridge (they dated for almost 10 years), but the Russell/Chuck storyline comes second because of the plot holes. Nobody knows if Chuck saw the whole tape or not before this episode, because if he did his breakdown doesn't make much sense. Was he worried about Raina finding out the thruth? Did he believed that Bart worked with Russell to kill Avery? Not only these question marks, but also what the hell with Jack? Not that I mind that he helped Chuck, this means we have no quarrel this season (I can't stand the guy) but why is he pulling a 180? Because he wants to be the only one who torments Chuck? Because he wants the company to stay in the family? Because being Bart's brother would endanger his name if Bart is framed as a killer? I just don't get it, some explaination would have been nice. I'm actually considering that in the next episode we found out he pulled another 180 and is making something that makes everything worse from afar. As for Charlie, I read in other article here that, depending of the dissease she could be unbalanced after loosing one dosis, so I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt. 4. If by mean girls you would have said Mini Serena and Mini Blair I would have said them, because their scene with Chuck was beyond awesome! I wonder if there is a Mini Chuck for Mini Blair (that hopefully learns a little from the original Chuck's mistakes?). But since they are not included I'm gonna go with Jack, which is saying something because I hate the guy (nothing against the actor, though). The guy was hillarious and his behaviour even kinda reminded me of Season 1 Chuck. Jack looked like the kid and Chuck looked like the adult, he was even making gestures trying to stop Jack's ramblings. Cyrus is a closed second because he's a darling (I found the hug with the princess inappropiate even for him but he charmed her, somebody even commented that Eleanor seemed jealous at one point). Kati and Iz interactions with Blair and later Dan and Charlie didn't do it for me, I can barely consider them interactions. 5. Reading the scale is fun but I never cared so much of voting in it, and I never had a problem with Vanessa except in 2 occasions (when she slept with Chuck and when she conspired with Juliet) so I'm going to pass this one out of respect for the character and her departure (and I'm too in mourning because Jenny or Vanessa were my OTP for Nate). 6. Neither. The most Louis can aspire for is a summer engagement that will be doomed in Season 5. As for Chuck, I think it would be good terms for him and B, and then off to season 5. @Victoria: Because name calling and bullying others over the Internet like you are doing with your post isn't abuse, right?

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Wow. This forums gotten vicious. Well, I guess any publicity is good publicity (for the show, I mean.) What was up with Blair's dream sequence? I mean, who directed that? That was just embarrassing.

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I am very excited for next week's episode. Cyrus was my favorite cameo and his reference to the Princess Bride was awesome. I found the Thorpe/Bass storyline unbelievable but am glad that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I also think that Jack Bass needs to be come a series regular instead of that nutso Charlie.
Also, I still want Blair to choose Chuck. I don't care what anyone says - those two are perfect together. As for Vanessa, good riddance and good luck!

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also, @diala, are you kidding me? would you fuck a guy who sold you for a hotel, slept with your supposed mortal enemy, embarrassed you in front of a room full of people, and almost punched your face over you trying to move on with your life, amongst SO MANY other things? "hot chair sex" that idiot.

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Shut the fuck up you stupid ass chair stans. Everywhere I go you dumbasses seem to be. This show sucks now that dan and blair apparently went to hell. Abuse of ANY kind should not be supported.

Gossip Girl Season 4 Episode 21 Quotes

Chuck: So I thought I'd bring some luxury across the river. Brooklyn needs it. It's all bars, bakeries and babies. No hotel in sight. Charles Place. You up to attend the ribbon cutting?
Nate: No thanks.
Chuck: Still pissed I lied to Reina about my father?
Nate: It was a big lie. Even for you.
Chuck: That's why I'm stepping out from under his dark shadow and away from the Bass name.
Nate: Whatever you want to call yourself or your hotel, you're still the same person.

Good morning, Sleepyheads. Looks like "dream until your dreams come true" wasn't such a good idea after all.

Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl Season 4 Episode 21 Music

  Song Artist
One-in-the-world One In the World Tapes n Tapes iTunes
Sensitive-kid Sensitive Kid Cold War Kids iTunes
Drinks-on-the-house-as-heard-on-new-amsterdam Drinks On the House (As Heard On New Amsterdam) Daniel May iTunes
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