Gossip Girl Review: Despicably High-Brow

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"Maybe you've been so busy worried about what everyone thinks that you forgot who you actually are. Which is a shame, because you should see what I see." - Dan

It's all about appearances, right? This week's Gossip Girl was all about the upper crust of the UES behaving badly - despicably if you will - in the name of getting what they want, for the sake of their respective reputations.

Meanwhile, the Humphrey men struggled to make sense of it all.

In a sense, "Despicable B" was like old times on Gossip Girl, with various stories of social scheming, though certain characters have arguably lost their way to the point where their actions cease to be believable.

Blair clearly has lost her way, somewhere between being traded for a hotel and selling out for a tiara. At least she admits as much, and has perhaps realizes at last that she can start being happy without preconditions.

Dair detractors may lament the couple's banality or lack of intense physical chemistry, but their connection runs deeper than the superficial. Going back to their days at W, Dan has loved Blair Waldorf for ... Blair Waldorf.

A Dair Picture

Dan always does his part. Whether or not you're a card-carrying member of Team Dair, you have to respect the genuine compassion, communication and respect between them. They are an equal partnership.

Fun as it was to see her so incredulous over Dan outshining her on the N.Y. Magazine Approval Matrix (a real, hilarious thing, even if Kim Kardashian's marriage lasting longer than B's isn't actually on it), our girl needs to regain her mojo. Strategizing to out-high-brow Dan at his own high-brow affair? Totally low-brow and beneath vintage B.

Dair's storyline had some wonderful moments - their heart-to-heart at the end, her botched attempt to generate interest from FIT, Dorota insisting B is still royalty to me! (FTW!) - but let's hope it marks a turning point.

She's got to know herself again, for real, and it'll be very interesting to see if Daniel Humphrey is by her side when she does. Who is the real B? Do any of us even know anymore? Just pray she tries to find her.

NOTE: It looks like B adopts an entirely different persona next week (see promo below).

Speaking of people unrecognizable from Season One ... when did Lily get so evil? Yes, she's always been materialistic, selfish and one to put on airs to a degree, but this level of vindictiveness is unprecedented.

If the whole plan all along was to nail Carol for fraud, well, kudos on the execution and all, but she'd already secured 50 percent of the estate, so what was the point? And why invite a reporter? To enhance her "image"? This is a woman who's been IN JAIL and married FIVE times. Pretty sure the reputation ship sailed long ago.

Notice she didn't deny paying off the nurse to sell out Ivy, either. That's just cold, Lil. Fortunately, Ivy proved her own goodness and/or naivete by tearing up the check at the end. Poor girl just wants a FAMILY! Not money!

Idiot. Did you see the zeroes on that thing?!

Rufus has clearly had it being lied to, and it's hard to blame the guy. He was always the trophy husband, but at least she was nice and they enjoyed each other's company. Now? Who knows who he's married to.

The problem with Lily's storyline was that unlike Blair's, it's just too complicated. Who can even keep track of all the lies and the reasons behind them, and at this point, are we emotionally invested in any of them?

Serena, Lily Pic

You know it's bad when William seems like a genuinely good guy just trying to do right by the four crazy women in his life. You almost feel bad for the guy. Maybe he'll figure out a way to leave all the money to Lola now.

Stranger things have happened ... on Gossip Girl.

Serena? She's just aimless at this point, a girl without a family, a real job, a boyfriend or much of a social life. It's sad, really, and makes you fear how low she'll go for attention in the next three weeks.

Perhaps the most significant (and most dubious) developments of the night came in the closing montage. First, Serena left the Gossip Girl server login info hanging out of her notebook! And Lola ganked it!

Week after week, characters one-up each other for biggest secret left out in the open. The people on this show need serious lessons in hiding sensitive information, because they make things too easy on lazy writers.

It's called a safe. Or a real doorman. Or a password on your iPhone. Or your pocket.

Okay, rant over. What do you think Lola will do with that info is the real debate. Give it back to the real G.G.? Become G.G. 4.0? Sell it back to Serena for her cut of the trust fund? Infinite, absurd possibilities.

Finally, Chuck Bass has been through about as many paternity twists as Gossip Girl has identity crises. Thanks to the busiest P.I. in the city and some (sexy!) mind games from Nate, we know Diana's a fraud.

You gotta love Nate going to bat for his friend and his company, while treating female fans to some gratuitous shirtless action to boot. Well played, Mr. Archibald ... and those who guessed Jack is Chuck's dad.

In real life, Desmond Harrington is 35 and Ed Westwick 24, BTW. A bit of a stretch. But if Chuck graduated high school just three years ago and Jack is around 40 ... we'll buy. Again, this is Gossip Girl people.

It STILL doesn't explain what Diana's angle is, though, and it starts to lose some of its punch when a huge bombshell is simply negated the following week. On a routine basis. Oh, yeah. That was a lie. Great.

Think he's actually Chuck's dad? And Elizabeth the mother after all? If so, why all the subterfuge? What's really going on here, and will the ultimate resolution to this ongoing saga finally be worth it?

We have our doubts, but here's hoping. Before we turn it over to your comments, here's next week's promo:

What did you think of tonight's Gossip Girl? Sound off now!


Editor Rating: 3.5 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 4.5 / 5.0 (790 Votes)

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.


Despicable GG. I cannot believe a tv show has the ability to upset me so much. The worst part is I dare not tell my friends I watch GG talk less of sharing my displeasure with the complete mess it has become. For the love of all things good, why is the hotel incident suddenly the reason Blair lost herself? Sure Chuck traded her to Jack BUT she didn't know that when she CHOSE to trade sex for property. Blair was as terrible as Chuck. I mean, what if Chuck hadn't traded her for a hotel and she slept with Jack to get Chuck his hotel back, does that make her less of a manipulative b**ch? This hotel biz needs to ends asap since she forgave him & even sabotaged him & Eva. She should have hooked up with Dan & left Chuck with Eva pls. Enough of this crap!


Btw I don't know if it's just me but I think lily is justified for univiting Rufus to the dinner. I know he's lily's husband and all but since the issues there were mostly about the Rhodes and VDWs rufus doesn't need to be there. At least that's what I thought. And he should really get off of his high horse IMO. She married lily he knows how she is he should just accept those shortcomings and try to right them and not judge it.


"traded for a hotel" she doesn't forget what he did to her. & she know that chuck is not good for her life.


Can you imagine somebody else playing Serena other than her? And sometimes she makes me believe she really is Serena it seems so natural to her even leighton playing Blair.


I've always thought Blake can be a pretty good actress if she's given the right material. I mean I don't get why people say she so bad when in fact she's playing Serena van der woodsen for Pete's sake. And I think if she's not good she won't be able to pull this character well.


I really liked this episode. But it totally broke my heart when I saw
Serena and her father confrontation on the streets. Daddy vdw has really been an awful father to Serena. Another thing I really love is this scheming lily. Very calculated and heartless I like this side of lily once in awhile. Now that Lola has the gg password what do you think will she do with it? Will she be GG 4.0? Also now i'm more confuse more than ever with chuck's familial issue can't the writers think of any other SL about chuck ? I mean isn't it enough that he doesn't know who is real mother is now he's not even sure about who his real father is?! Give him a break please. Can't he have just a simple problem like which tie goes with what coat? also, I was expecting more of Serena as GG but as always I'm disappointed with the writers.


@pty Blair was annoying until her final scene with Dan. She embarrassed herself at the function and was incredibly selfish. At least that was explained though. However only partially in my mind due to B not mentioning losing the baby. Now while her actions at the party make sense, many of her interactions with Dan don't. Like in the beginning when he leaned in for in a kiss? What was that? I find her often to be condescending and dismissive towards him. I don't know what they're going for in those scenes. @Renee I thought Blake was great. I especially liked her scene with William at the end and also when she got her bitch on towards Lola (mean but well done acting wise). Like the rest of the cast, I think all she needs is some decent material to shine.


Thank God at least Serena has become really interesting this season. Blake is doing some fine acting thus far. She has managed to distract me from all this Chair/Dair madness. I can't wait to see what is next for her especially when the the season finale comes. Apparently, there are reports indicating that this final episode revolves around her.


OMG!! Guess Chuck n Blair will be reunited very soon.. Finally I'm happy.


@db Oh I definitely agree with you. It seems everyone aside from Nate is unhappy to a certain degree. Both Serena and Blair are lost right now and I find it incredibly sad they don't talk to one another anymore. I don't get why Blairena can't share scenes because Dair is happening? I think Chuck and Serena's misery was more apparent to me because it was dwelled on for like 10 episodes straight. Most of Chuck and Serena's closing scenes have them staring blankly into some dark abyss. I've liked Serena as GG 3.0 since at least she's not so damn sad all the time. Now only part of the time! ha. I know they're doing this to evoke sympathy for the characters but it's not fun to watch and, ironically, the one terrible thing the actually needs to be addressed (the miscarriage) has been pushed under the rug. JMO of course.

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