Andy, have you never washed your hands before?

Johnny Karate: Listen, I know things are weird now. You’re at home. You miss school. How strange is that? You actually miss school. Your parents are home as well, and they’re trying to teach you, and it turns out they can’t teach you jack because they are so dumb. Well, kids, Johnny Karate wants you to know you must stay strong and be nice to your parents. Also, please wash them, wash your hands. And I know what you’re thinking: I’m a 38-year-old man, and I’ve literally never once washed my hands in my entire life.
Leslie: Andy, have you never washed your hands before?


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Parks and Recreation Season 8 Episode 0: "A Parks and Recreation Special"
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Parks and Recreation
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Parks and Recreation Season 8 Episode 0 Quotes

Ben: The most incredible thing happened. OK, so today I’m cleaning the house and get dizzy from the cleaning supplies, and then I homeschool the kids -- but they don’t learn anything because of the dizziness. But then I had the most amazing idea. Do you remember this guy?
Leslie: Oh no.
Ben: Ah, but here’s the twist. Do you also remember this?
Leslie: Oh no, oh, no, no, no. Oh no, no, no.
Ben: Six words babe: Cones of Dunshire the Claymation movie. The entire story just popped into my head. This humble little nobody, living his life, walking around on a random Tuesday when suddenly he finds out from an ancient scroll that he is actually the Ledgerman.
Leslie: Honey, did you put all the caps back on the cleaning supplies?
Ben: Now, the title is either “Cones of Dunshire: The Ledgerman’s Ascent” or, of course, “Cones of Dunshire: The Curse of the Arbadoo’s Prophecy.”

Hi, my name’s Bobby Newport, and as you can see I’m in Switzerland at my family’s private hunting estate, but I haven’t caught any yet. They’re so fast. You get close, and it’s like, zoom, they’re gone.

Bobby Newport

Parks and Recreation Season 8 Episode 0 Photos

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