Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation
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I will defeat you. I will defeat you right into my pants.

Tammy

Chicago has a lot of stuff and people, but I like to nothing and hang out with no one, so no thank you. And I love you. But no thank you.

April

Damn, Donna. Why you gotta bring the Quackson Five into this?

Ginuwine

Well, which one is it? Fruity or earthy? It can’t be both! They’re mutually exclusive!

Craig

Michelle Obama: Well, you know how I feel about Chicago.
Leslie: You’re from Chicago so you like it!

And what exactly does Gryzzl do? It’s a cloud for your cloud. I have no idea.

Ben

A soft opening tomorrow? From now on everyone call me Kristin because I’m wigging out!!

Craig

Excuse me, Miss Hanley? Would you mind if I snapped a you-y? It’s what I call selfies of other people.

Tom

I hate doing work, but I love being flattered. So maybe I’ll give it another try.

Tom

Despite what my pocket square says, I’m not a billionaire.

Tom

Tom: What is this, a rotten grapefruit?
Larry: No, it’s my dog’s rectum.

Please, Ron. I’ve never asked you for anything today.

Tom
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 1356 in total

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.