Popular Quotes
Leslie: Get out of here Ed, I fired you!
Ed: Oh, yeah. If anyone wants to hang, I'll be at Subway!
Amanda: Al Gore. My panties are getting damp.
Darla: Yup. I forgot how restful and peaceful it was when you were catatonic.
Professor: Man is so infinitely different from God he can only communicate with God indirectly.
Jamie: What about the potential to actually encounter God.
Professor: Not sure what you're getting at.
Jamie: [reading] When two people relate to each other authentically and humanly, God is the electricity that surges between them.
Carisi's driving? Great.
Amaro
Osvaldo: Boaz would have killed my family in Mexico. Better me than them. So come on. Get on with it.
Pote: Let me tell you something, Cabron, if my woman dies I’m going to be the one visiting your family. And I can promise you one thing, I’ll do a lot worse than Boaz.
Holy shit. I just got a retweet from Eric Trump!
Kai
Coach: Remember when you sat out of the game because you were sad?
Winston: I was also cold.
I love you, Jessica--God, it feels good to say that out loud, and not just to my sleeping wife.
Berkley
Ian: He lifted his tail and sprayed a foul liquid from his ass!
Auntie Jocasta: You encountered a skunk, lad.
Jamie: A skunk? Is that venomous?
Claire: No, just malodorous.
Listen, we're not trying to step on the foot of big government, we're just trying to not die.
Pete
Ross: Listen, I need a favor. Um, I was in the shower, and as I was cleansing myself, I, ah, I, well I felt something.
Chandler: Was it like a sneeze only better?
Dr. Cox: All righty, let's go for the hat-trick, there, doc.
Doctor: Are you sure?
Jordan: Hey, doc! Zip it, grip it, and snip it!