Amy: This year's donations may go to, say, the geology department.
Sheldon: Oh dear, not the dirt people.

Until you manage to upload your intelligence into a self-sustaining, orbiting satellite equipped with high-speed internet and a cloaking device, you will be dependent on the human race.

I'm prone to night terrors, so if I wake up kicking and screaming, don't panic. Just pin me down and stroke my hair and I'll be fine.

I obviously have the flu, coupled with sudden on-set Tourette's Syndrome.

Amy: I have potential for sexual arousal.
Sheldon: A cross we all must bear.

Amy: Sheldon, I am not going through menopause.
Sheldon: Are you sure? You said that with the testy bark of an old bitty.

TBBT Quotes

Penny: What actor holds the record for being named People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive?
Sheldon: William Shatner!
Leonard: I don't think it's Shatner.
Sheldon: Then it's got to be Patrick Stewart

Penny: Hey, Sheldon, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
Sheldon: Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.